The other side
by A-Karana
Summary: On the Nico files we get to see a different side of him. What if Dani starts seeing this side as well?
1. The friend Nico

****So, it's been a while since I wrote my last story and I am not sure if I am still able to write. However after seeing the Nico files I couldn't get the idea out of my head anymore and this story was born. Seriously, how amazing is the Nico files? I LOVE it. It gives us more Nico than we have on the show. I just wish that they would finally end this Matt and Dani thing on the show, so we couldn finally get more Dani and Nico scenes. they have been rare since they got her and Matt together.

Anyway, let me know what you think!

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**Chapter 1: Friend Nico**

"Hey Dani," Matt smiled when he saw his girlfriend walking towards him at the Hawks facility. She wasn't supposed to be in that day and he hadn't expected to see her before the evening, if at all, so he was glad she had driven all the way just to see him.

"Hey back," she mirrored his smile and quickly glanced at her watch what didn't go unnoticed.

"As much as I appreciate it that you came all the way just to visit me, I don't want you to stress yourself," he offered friendly.

"Actually I'm not here for you," she replied with a bit of hesitation and dragged the words out while an embarrassed blush appeared on her cheeks.

"No?" he was surprised.

"I'm here to find Nico," she said and the way she pronounced his name made it clear that she didn't come in peace.

"Nico? What for?" his curiosity kicked in.

"I have to talk to him about a patient of mine and his meddling," she remained vague, but he knew that she couldn't say much more. Once again she glanced at her watch. "I really have to hurry. I have an hour until my next patient shows up and I want this out of the way by then."

"Then don't let me keep you. We'll see each other tonight?" he asked hopefully.

"Actually I promised the kids that we'd go out to the movies. And since they are not allowed to bring a partner, neither should I..." she replied apologetically.

Matt didn't give up that easily. "Ok, then I'll call you once you're back."

"Why don't I call you. Easier that way," she smiled and then was off with a wave in the direction of Nico's office. Matt thought about following her and spying on them, but he knew that nothing went unnoticed by Careles and he would kill him for it.

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Dani opened the door without knocking and stepped into his office. he was standing behind his desk, fiddling with some kind of tablet.

"There you are," she said in greeting and slowly he looked up, giving her the feeling that he wasn't at all surprised that she was here. Could he really know what brought her here?

"Yes," he nodded. "How can I help you doctor?" he asked and focused back on his ipad. Dani made a point of closing the door behind her and then walked up to his desk and remained standing.

"A certain situation has been brought to my attention, Mr. Careles and I need to talk to you about it," she replied.

"You could have called," he said without looking up. Dani frowned. It wasn't like Nico to ignore her when she wanted to talk to him. Now that she thought about it though she realized that they hadn't really talked as friends ever since Nico had found Matt at her house the night that TK had been shot. He was all smart remarks, allusions and mystery again. She frowned even more when she realized that it had taken her that long to realize it. When was the last time they had bantered like they used to?

"I did, but it seems like you're not taking my calls anymore. " Her voice went from teasing to hurt, but he still didn't look at her.

"I had something important to take care of. I'd have called you back later."

"Yeah sure," she replied sarcastically. When he looked up and raised one eyebrow she suddenly knew that she wouldn't get anywhere if she wouldn't let go of her sudden anger and disappointment. She took a deep breath before she spoke again.

"I spoke to a new patient for the first time today and I was really surprised by what she had to tell me." She sat down in a chair in front of his desk and tried to look as relaxed as she could. She actually really relaxed a bit more when he sat down as well.

"Marshall Pittman's secretary Darcy showed up today for her first appointment, but I guess I am not telling you anything new, because she told me that her good friend Nico had suggested that she'd visit me," she let the cat out of the bag and grinned in amusement when she saw him flinch when she said 'good friend Nico'. "She also told me that her friend Nico has been there for her ever since she found out her boyfriend had repeatedly cheated on her and that friend Nico is really worried about her violent tendencies." Dani smirked at him.

"I can assure you that I am neither her friend nor on a first name basis with her," he tried to defend himself and sat up straight in his chair.

"So you didn't tell her to confront her boyfriend about certain photos on Facebook?" she asked and then suddenly grinned even wider. "Oh, and speaking of Facebook, Darcy assured me that you intend to go on Facebook to network. I hope you befriend me then so I can see your, no doubt, very interesting profile." Nico groaned in annoyance and Dani giggled. God, she had missed annoying him.

"What else did _my friend_ Darcy tell you?" Nico asked warily.

"Just what an incredibly good listener you are and how you are always there for her. So, are you getting a Facebook account?" She wouldn't let him get off the hook that easily.

"No, I am not going on Facebook nor am I a good listener or a good friend. Darcy nearly caught me when I took the bug out of Marshalls phone and I had to distract her," he admitted, knowing that he would never hear the end of it if Dani kept thinking he cared.

"Aaah, now we're talking," Dani smirked and didn't seem the least shocked. "Is there a bug in my phone, too?" she asked him then.

"No," he shook his head and started fiddling with his ipad again.

"Proof it!" she requested, still with a small smile on her face, that had got bitter around the edges of her mouth though. He knew that if there was a bug in her phone she would kill him. She held out her hand with the phone in it and he took it from her, paying attention that he wouldn't touch her. Under her penetrating stared he opened the back of her phone, took out everything that could be taken out and showed it to her.

"See, no bug," he told her and then re-assembled her phone and handed it back to her.

"Thank you," she said when she took it from and slipped it in her bag, the smile now more relaxed again. Silence set in and started to stretch while they looked at each other over his desk. It had been months since they had last talked, really talked or had been alone together. Beside when she had texted him about Damon and he had appeared in her car again out of the blue and when she had given him advice on how to deal with sharks.

"How are you Nico?" she asked him softly and broke the silence after a while.

"I'm good," he was too quick too reply and she knew that he wasn't telling the truth.

"Have you talked to Marshall recently?"

"No, but I was told that he arrived safely and has taken to silent meditation," Nico said and couldn't keep the amusement out of his voice.

"That's good. I mean, if it helps him," Dani shrugged. "What about Gabrielle and Juliette? How are they dealing with the divorce?" Dani knew that he didn't like talking about it, but for one she was curious and also she doubted that he talked to anyone else about the things that were important to him and that wasn't good. And Juliette and Gabrielle were important to him or had been at least.

"I don't know. Juliette is still out snorkeling somewhere. And Gabrielle... I haven't talked to her since the evening before Marshalls breakdown," Nico replied anyway and finally put the ipad down on his desk.

"You met her that night?" Dani was surprised. She had thought that their affair was over and done with.

"Yes, I had to talk to her, but it was to no avail," he sighed.

"You tried to make her cancel the meeting," Dani knew and Nico nodded. Dani cocked her head to the side as she studied him while he seemed to remember the meeting. He had wanted to protect his friend Marshall and he would even meet with the woman he was possibly still in love with. He must really like Marshall. He was such a good friend to him.

"Marshall was spinning out of control and I had to stop it somehow. I tried, but he throw me out and fired me and I couldn't let him go on. I've always had his back, but that day when he threatened... he went too far," Nico explained. After another moment of silence when he was still deep in thought, still remembering he added quietly, while he focused on his hands " I like moxy."

Dani's eyes widened and her breath caught in her throat. She knew that expression and she knew when she had last heard it: When Marshall had threatened her in his office. Nico had been fired and he had met with his ex, just because of her. he hadn't been loyal to Marshall as she had thought. He had done it all for her. Tears suddenly stung in her eyes and she took another deep breath so she wouldn't start bawling in his office. Nico was looking at her by then and shyly she raised her eyes and looked into his.

"Thank you, Nico," she told him with as much emphasis as she could. Nico didn't reply, he just gave her one of his rare smiles. She smiled back at him and the atmosphere between them changed. Danielle was aware that her pulse sped up and there were flutters in her stomach that she just shouldn't feel.

"I have to go, my next patient is probably already waiting for me," she said and broke the connection.

"Have a good day doctor," Nico nodded and picked the tablet back up.

"You,too, " she replied and made her way to his door. In the doorframe she stopped. "Hey Nico," she said and grinned.

"What?" he asked her with a smile, knowing already that some smart ass remark was about to come his way.

"I'll be waiting for your friend request on facebook. And so is Darcy," she said and then walked out the door. When she heard him groan in annoyance she started laughing. It was nice talking to him again, she thought. She had missed him.

**TBC**


	2. The Nico chat

******Thank you all so much for your encouraging reviews. Usually I write a story pretty fast, but with this one it won't work because I have to wait for the Nico files to appear and then go with it. The chapter for NF2 will be up as soon as possible, but I decided to add a little filler so it will become clearer why Dani is acting the way Dani will be acting. I found some typos in the last chapter and I will fix them later. Hopefully I caught them all this time, but then again I highly doubt it. Hope you like it anyway.**

**Chapter 2: The Nico chat**

When Dani got home that night she changed into her pajamas, washed off her makeup, put on her glasses and started her laptop. She quickly wanted to check her emails before she called Matt. Most likely they would talk for a few minutes and then argue like teenagers who would have to hang up first. Matt make her feel like a teenager a lot. She knew that she was giggly and girly as soon as he was around, also more whiny and clingy. He seemed to love it, but sometimes when she was alone she wondered what caused her to change so much whenever he was around. She hadn't acted that immature when she had been with J.D. And even with Ray she had acted more mature. Maybe that was it, she wondered. Maybe because she had become a mom at such a young age she was trying to make up for it now?

Maybe she should ask him later if he had an idea, she thought as she opened her email inbox. She clicked through several junk mails before one from Facebook caught her attention. It couldn't be... A large grin lit up her whole face when she saw the friend request from one NicoC. Of course she had to accept it immediately and opened Facebook. Once she had added him she flipped through the profile, but of course it was empty. No photos, no infos, zilch. And she was his only friend so far.

"Of course, Mr. Mysterious," she muttered disappointedly, but stopped frowning when she realized he was still online and had the chat turned on.

_**D: Got ya! Thanks for the friend request, I didn't think you were serious about joining Facebook. What are you doing now? I hope you're filling out your profile, but I guess you're snooping.**_She wrote with a smile on her face and hit the send button. She didn't have to wait long for an answer.

**N: **_**No one but you knows that I have an account and I intend to keep it that way. And I am not snooping. Nothing on here I don't already know.**_Dani wrinkled her nose and was tempted to make a quiz out of her favorite music and Tv shows.

_**D: So why did you sign up?**_

_**N: just because I knew that a certain doctor I know would never stop bugging me about it if I didn't.**_His response made her smile and the nervous flutters in her stomach were back. She placed a hand on her belly and enjoyed the feeling. She wasn't used to it that friends could make her that nervous and giddy, especially not over a chat, but that was just Nico.

_**D: This doctor sounds just delightful!**_ She replied cheekily and adjusted her position on the bed. She wondered briefly if Nico was also lying in bed with glasses on his nose as he was writing to her, but knew that he would never answer that question.

_**N: Try annoying. What are you still doing online? Don't you usually go to bed around eleven?**_Nico was back to being his grumpy self, but she didn't mind. She wasn't even surprised that he knew at what time she usually went to bed. Maybe she should ask him if he bugged her bedroom? The thought made her flush and she decided that not knowing might be better this time.

_**D: yes, I do and it creeps me out that you know that. That is, if a certain mysterious security guy doesn't show up at my house in the middle of the night because of some ominous situation.**_

_**N: Now he sounds just delightful. But I haven't come to your house at night in a while and you didn't answer my question.**_The first part of his answer made her smile. Nico always had a witty comeback and that's what made it so fun to banter with him. The second part however made her squint. It was true, he hadn't been over in a while. The last time he had stopped by in the middle of the night had been when TK had been shot and he had walked in on her and Matt. the last time he had been over altogether was when he texted her to come outside and then paid her a dollar for her secrecy and played Marshall's talk to himself. Why didn't he come over anymore? Why didn't he knock in her door anymore but texted her instead? It had been a lame excuse that he had wanted to talk to her in his car. What was it that had caused her to lose Nico's trust? They had been past the paying her for secrecy and now they were suddenly back to it. He didn't see her as a friend anymore, but as a therapist who needed to be paid. All the happiness and giddiness she had felt before drained from her in seconds and an empty feeling remained. Should she ask him about it here on the chat? She was staring at the screen for a good five minutes before she finally began to type.

_**D: I just got back from. The movies and some late dinner with my kids. Now I wanted to check my mail because I haven't done that all day. And it's true, you haven't interrupted my sleep in a while. What gives? No more situations? **_Maybe playing it light was a good idea. If this didn't get her anywhere she could still grill him in person later.

_**N: None that required your help at night. It could either wait or I got it alone.**_She didn't like his reply one bit. She had considered her and Nico friends and a team to some extent. They were the fixers of the Hawks and they worked together. They did not tell each other everything but they worked together. His reply made it clear though that the time of teamwork was over. Nico was back to doing everything on his own. Her partner seemed gone and a sudden sadness overtook her. She didn't want to lose her partner and friend.

_**D: you know that I REALLY don't mind when you wake me up to help you, right?**_ She emphasized. How could she get him to work with her again if she didn't even know where the problem was?

_**N: yeah, we'll, maybe you don't but I know for a fact that Donally gets in a foul mood when he is woken up in the middle of the night.**_ Matt? He was worried about Matt's mood? What the heck was going on here? If Matt didn't like it that she got woken up for work in the middle of the night he should just sleep at his place!... Whoa, where had that come from?

_**D: Nico, I don't want my relationship with Matt stop you when you need help. I'm here, I'm your friend and I don't mind.**_She wrote quickly and didn't dwell too long on her last thought. She needed to fix this and fast. She waited for a reply, and waited, and waited. She just wanted to ask if he was still there after ten minutes of silence t then his reply popped up.

_**N: Which movie did you watch?**_He was avoiding answering her. That was not good. That was bad, really bad, even for Nico's 'I avoid nearly every straight answers'-standards.

_**D: The new ice age movie.**_

_**N: 3D?**_We're they really talking about a movie after he had just revealed that he didn't trust her anymore because of her relationship with Matt? He would deny it if she would ask him, but it was all in the subtext and she was trained to read subtext after all.

_**D: Yes, it was really funny and a nice bonding experience with my kids. Now that RayJay has Olivia and Lindsay more and more has her own life these moments have become rare**._

_**N: The circle of life**_

_**D: are you really quoting the lion king now?**_She tried to bring the humor back into the conversation after it had become just too mundane and random.

_**N: ;o)**_ Did he just wink at her? He sent her a winking smilie, so he winked at her. In her head she could see him do it for real, although he had never done it. Nico winking at her... She would probably blush like a schoolgirl, her knees would go weak and she would dissolve into a puddle. The flutters were back. Nico Careles winking at her... YUMMY!

_**D: Jeanette will never believe me that you just send me that winking smilie. I think I am in shock.**_ Shock was a bit of an understatement. A winking Nico would be hot as hell... Jeez, was she even allowed to think this? She had a boyfriend, a hot one... Then again the thoughts were free.

_**N: Close your mouth, doctor. I know how to chat, obviously. ;o)**_There he went again with the winking. Bastard! as if he knew what it did to her.

_**D: Do you spy on people in chats? ;)**_Payback is a bitch. However it would probably do nothing to him if she winked at him.

_**N: Sometimes. It's unbelievable what people put on the Internet about their private lives.**_

_**D: Will you at least fill out your profile here on Facebook?**_

_**N: No. Why should I? People can always ask if they want to know something.**_He was joking right? There was no one who could deflect a question like he could and here he was presenting himself as an open book?

_**D: yeah, sure, because you are always answering questions about yourself *insert snorting here***_

_**N: what do you want to know?**_Ha! This was her chance!

_**D: let's see what it says on here. Name and job I know. Religion?**_

_**N: Catholic, not practicing**._

_**D: I'm not surprised. Favorite quote?**_

_**N: Don't have one.**_Oh Nico...

_**D: favorite book?**_

_**N: No time to read.**_Gah!

_**D: favorite music?**_

_**N: No idea.**_Niiicoooo! She could picture him sitting there with this smug smile on his face which he always had when he had avoided answering a question.

_**D: Niiiicooooo, this is frustrating! You are avoiding answering again!**_

_**N: I have to go. I'll think about your questions and get back to you later. **_Yeah, sure, as if he would ever do this.

_**D: if I send you more questions via pm will you answer them as well? :D**_

_**N: good night doctor! You better call Donally now otherwise he will already be asleep.**_

_**D: How do you know that I am going to call Matt?**_

**NicoC has signed off.**

"Oh Nico, " Dani sighed frustrated. Not only hadn't he answered any of her questions, but he left her with the realization that the night he had found Matt at her place had destroyed their fragile friendship and had brought them back to coworkers, and not really close ones. When she had met Nico she had wondered what had made him so closed off and wary, but she had come to understand that it was part of his job. His strange friendship with Marshall and the confession of his affair with Gabrielle Pittman had provided a bit more insight, but not enough to decipher him completely.

It wasn't fair that he had to deal with all of his problems alone. She had seen that the Pittman divorce had been hard for him. He had witnessed all the fights and he had put his career on the line when Marshall had spun out of control and had threatened her. Now all that was left was one hot mess and it was Nico's job to fix it all. He needed a friend, someone to talk to and she wanted to be it.

The whole situation left her restless and she lay awake for hours, thinking about how to fix her broken friendship with him. She had to. He meant too much to her to lose him.

**TBC**


	3. Nico s touching

**Took me a bit longer to write this. Mainly because I wanted to wait for the last episode and also the last Nico files. this chapter might contain SPOILERS to some extend. Not too many, not too much, but you'll see. Just wanted to warn you.**

**Thank you so much for the great reviews, I hope you keep them coming. I love hearing your thoughts on this. It might give me ideas as well ;)**

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**Chapter 3: Nico(s) touching**

Since Jeanette had come back Dani had forgotten all about her problems with Nico. She had focused more on her relationship with Matt and her friendship with Jeanette. It was easier that way and also she had barely seen Nico around. Since the new general manager was in place he seemed always gone. T.K. had told her that he had invited Nico to dinner for something he had helped him with. He hadn't been very specific and Dani knew that Nico had most likely sworn TK to secrecy.

Matt was off on another assignment the new manager had for him and she and Jeanette had decided to go out for dinner. They had barely entered the restaurant when her friend grasped Dani's arm and stage whispered :" Isn't that tall, dark and mysterious over there?"

Dani followed her eyes and found Nico sitting at a table in a corner, having dinner while he read something on his Ipad.

"Yes, but let's not go over there," Dani requested.

"Why not? Trouble in paradise because you're with Matt?" Jeanette grinned cheekily. Dani knew she would lose this battle with her friend or dish everything that she thought she knew- but she wasn't so sure she wanted her friend to analyze the situation. She didn't know Nico and she didn't know what kind of man he was and so it would only be too easy to mistake his most recent behavior for jealousy, when Dani was sure it was something else.

"Fine, let's go over and say hello," Dani sighed and didn't miss the surprise on her friends face at her sudden change of mind. Then however she smiled brightly and walked ahead of Dani to Nico's table.

"Hello there Mr. Mystery man," Jeanette greeted him and Nico slowly looked up. He looked surprised at first but recovered in a split second and his face first became expressionless, then it changed to friendly but reserved Nico.

"Good evening Ms. Fiero," he said with a small smile and nodded as he got up. "Doctor," he nodded in Dani's direction once he towered over them.

"Hi Nico," Dani replied and smiled back at him.

"Seems like you were also in the mood of Mexican tonight," Jeanette took over once again and even flirted a bit with Nico.

"I am in the mood for Mexican every Friday," Nico confirmed with a smile and seemed to flirt right back in his subtle Nico ways.

"So Tuesdays it's Italian, Fridays Mexican," Dani spoke up and included herself in the conversation again before they really started to flirt and would forget she was there.

"Something like that," he replied with the same smile. Then it changed a bit, to more reserved and he took a step closer to his chair again. " Enjoy your dinner ladies," he said and it was obvious that he had just dismissed them and wanted to sit back down. Dani felt both relieved and disappointed and fought hard to keep her smile in place as she opened her mouth to say goodbye. Jeanette was faster however.

"Oh, we can't leave you here all by yourself. You don't mind, don't you?" she said and had sat down before Nico could reply. He let out a breath of resignation , which didn't go unnoticed by Dani and caused her to feel another stab in her chest. What was going on that Nico didn't want her around anymore?

"Of course not," Nico said as he sat down as well. Dani remained standing and contemplated for a second where she should sit down. There were two empty chairs left at the table. One next to Jeanette, the other next to Nico. Her first instinct was to sit down next to Jeanette, because it felt safer and less awkward. Then however she thought about the fact that she would have to sit across from Nico all evening and that felt even weirder. So, she took the seat next to Nico, opposite of Jeanette, so she could talk to her friend while blocking out the guy next to her.

Nico waved the waiter over once they were all seated. " Two red wines and one water," he ordered, "and the menus for the ladies , please."

"Your usual, sir?" the waiter asked referring to the wine.

"Yes, Hernando," Nico nodded and the waiter was off again.

"You always know what others want?" Jeanette was back to flirting with him.

"No, but I know that pregnant women shouldn't drink," Nico deadpanned and while Jeanette gaped at him in disbelieve, Dani started laughing.

"What..how... who?" Jeanette stuttered and couldn't believe that he knew that she was pregnant when she had known for only two days.

"You bought the test with the good doctors business credit card, since you forgot yours in Spain, I assume. Lindsay doesn't have a boyfriend at the moment and from what else I have seen it's highly unlikely that it was for the doctor herself so that leaves only you," Nico enlightened her. As he spoke Dani stopped laughing and blushed bright red when she realized that not only Nico had to know that she had got a prescription for the pill from the doctor, paid by the Hawks, but since Matt paid everything with his credit card sponsored by the Hawks, he must know about the condoms, too. How awkward was that!

"Remind me to talk to you about this later," she muttered in his direction, a threat swinging in her voice.

"I told you what a check for first round picks includes. Doctors and staff is considered first round picks," Nico shrugged and thanked the waiter when he brought their drinks.

"Have you already decided what you want to eat?" the young man asked and both Dani and Jeanette placed their orders.

"So, Nico, what have you been up to? I haven't seen you around Dani's since I am back," Fiero asked.

"I've been busy. Lots of changes at the Hawks," he said without giving too much away.

"Yes, professionally and personally, I hear," Jeanette giggled in Dani's direction, who only rolled her eyes. Nico didn't reply at all, but just took a sip of his red wine.

"How long will you stay?" he asked her then. While Nico interviewed her friend without that she even realized it Dani listened intently to the conversation and tried to hear the things Nico wasn't saying. He knew his way around Spain and Europe and Dani realized that he must have been there already. He knew certain restaurants and places and in a way you only know when you've been there in person. She also noticed that he cleverly avoided answering any of Jeanette's questions while she tried to flirt him into giving out information. However he didn't give anything away, not even if he had been there or how long he had stayed in Spain. Dani knew that Nico only gave information, no matter how small and insignificant, out to people he knew and trusted. She had realized it last week when she had found the coach drunk in his office and he had let it slip that Nico had found him pretty much in the same state the night before and had driven him home. He had mentioned Nico singing and had told her the story about Nico and the Mellow Ds. Afterwards he had sworn her to secrecy, because even in his intoxicated brain he had known he was in trouble if Nico ever found out he had told her the story. Dani had kept a close eye on the coach and had talked to him the next day when he had been sober. As far as she knew he hadn't had a drink since then.

"Matt told us you handcuffed TK today," Dani heard Jeanette say and realized they must have changed the topic.

"Oh, did he," Nico said, making it apparent that her boyfriend wasn't his favorite person.

"And TK told me that it wasn't the first time. Something you want to share, Nico?" Dani used the opportunity to tease him with one raised eyebrow.

"Their pranks had gotten out of control and TK always needs to learn the hard way," he shrugged unimpressed and didn't comment on her allusion.

"TK stopped because you handcuffed him?" Dani asked disbelievingly and snorted.

"He gave me cigars as a present later," Nico tried to fool her, but Dani saw right through him, because his eyes twinkled in amusement. There was more to this story.

"And? Did they explode?" she asked with a smile as she turned in her seat so she could see him better.

"No, they did not, neither did the box," he shook his head and smiled back.

"But?" she dragged the word out and kept the eye connection with him.

"There was a banana stuck in my exhaust and there was a guy with a mask and an ice hokey stick lying on my back seat, " he admitted.

"I knew it" Dani exclaimed and placed her hand on his arm conspiratorially.

"I caught it both before though," Nico clarified, his smile gone and he pulled his arm away. Dani's smile wavered, but she tried to keep it in place even when he rejected her that way.

"Your dinner," the waited interrupted them and placed the plates in front of Dani and Jeanette, while Nico started eating his salad again.

"Oh, that looks delicious," Dani said to break the awkward silence and kept her eyes on her friend.

"Yeah, but the smell..." Jeanette pressed out and then darted from the table in direction of the toilettes.

"Seems like the baby doesn't like fish," Dani muttered, feeling sorry for her friend as well as feeling annoyed and awkward because she was alone with Nico.

"What are you thinking of TK's sudden recovery?" Nico asked her and switched back to save business-related topics.

"I'm glad he's feeling better, but something tells me that there's more to it," she shrugged, not really keen on discussing her job on a free night.

"He's been eating his pain killers like candy," Nico shocked her by saying.

"What? Is the coach aware of that?"

"No, but your boyfriend is, he's been getting him the prescriptions from the doctor," Nico told her, annoyance more than clear in his voice.

"I'm sure he isn't aware what this could lead to," she defended Matt.

"He's been in the sports business for too long to not know it. But his job is to keep the team up and running and as assistant manager even more so. He's making good career choices, " Nico made his point clear without spelling it out. He believed that Matt put his career before the well being of the players. She didn't want to believe it.

"He's helping the Hawks and he is successful with his buying strategies," she tried to argue Matt's case again.

"He's bypassing and betraying the coach, putting unnecessary pressure on the players and ultimately hurting the team," Nico didn't hold back this time.

"Then why don't you stop him like you used to?" she hissed at him. It was that or yelling.

"Because right now with the new general manager applied by the league, I'm in no position to ... at least not without ruining his career forever and hurting other people," Nico said insistently and the way he looked at her made it clear that with "other people" he meant her.

"I'll talk to him," she said as her eyes softened and once again her hand was placed on his arm. This time however he didn't pull away, but allowed her to get lost in his eyes for a moment.

"Dani, I think I'll go home. I don't feel that well," Jeanette burst their bubble a second later when she swayed back to the table.

"Ok, then let's get you home," Dani said and got up, removing her hand from Nico's arm.

"No, you stay and enjoy your dinner. I'll take a cab," Jeanette protested.

"I'm not leaving you alone right now, girlfriend. I will just take dinner home with me and re-heat it," Dani insisted, also because after she realized that she _had _actually got lost in Nico's eyes, she knew she shouldn't be alone with him and red wine.

"Feel better ," Nico told her after he had once again waved over the waiter and the young man had brought back Dani's food in a takeout box.

"Thank you, Nico," Jeanette replied meekly.

"We should talk about all this, Nico. We have to find a way to help TK," Dani said .

"I will find a way," he assured her and dismissed her at the same time.

"See you tomorrow," she said and made it clear that the discussion wasn't over.

"See you tomorrow, Doctor," he smiled knowingly, amused that she insisted on this. He shook his head slightly as he watched her walk away with her friend and knew that he had to do something. He couldn't go on like that... all this couldn't go on like that.

* * *

The next day Dani drove to the Hawks facility as soon as she could. She and Nico needed a strategy how to get TK off the painkillers, how to do damage control because of the new general manager and how to help the coach and Matt to get along. Dani knew Matt didn't mean any harm, he just wanted to help as much as she did, he only had a different opinion on how to help than Nico or the coach.

She entered the office building and made a bee line around Matt's office, because she didn't want to get distracted by him. And he was very good at distracting her, she thought with a smile.

Then however she stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Nico coming out of his office with a woman she hadn't seen before. She was dressed in a black, tight etui dress and a grey jacket. Her long dark curls were falling loosely over her shoulders as she walked in front of Nico out of his office, an amused smile on her face that mirrored the one that Nico wore. She was beautiful. The realization didn't disturb Dani too much, because she was too distracted by the way her breath had got stuck in her throat. She pressed herself into the nearest corner so they wouldn't see her. When they had passed her and Dani tried breathing again it brought tears to her eyes because it hurt too much. Her chest was too tight all of a sudden, her throat was closed and her eyes stung. Dani slumped against the wall behind her. Nico had called the beauty Vera and he had his hand placed on her lower back while they walked out. Dani knew Nico and she knew that he had to have a connection with this Vera. She hated that woman. And she hated him, for what she wasn't sure yet. She couldn't analyze her own feelings right then, because she was hurting too much to even think.

**TBC**


	4. Nico's song

******Thank you so much for the kind reviews for the last chapter and the adds as followers. I hope this chapter has less typos than the last one, although I fixed it. Sorry again for that.**

**I wasn't really sure what to make of this weeks episode and the Nico files. Especially because I am still missing 3 minutes of the episode. It just didn't record. So, sorry if some of this doesn't make sense together with the episode, but the last scene I saw was Nico watching the video of TK.**

**Hope you like this chapter anyway.**

* * *

**Chapter 4: Nico and the song**

When Dani left the Hawks facility that night she wasn't ready to go home. Too much had happened and she felt like a tornado had come into her life and was spinning everything around her head. It had been like that for three days and the clarity she was seeking hadn't come yet. Her son was heartbroken, her best friend pregnant, TK was doped up on painkillers and didn't seem aware of the problem. And then there were the two men in her life: She was sure that Nico was still having an affair with that league chick and she had started and affaire with Matt. She wasn't sure which of the two was more wrong and would hurt her more in the long run. Although she hadn't seen Vera around for over a week, she still couldn't get the picture out of her head. It was burned in her mind that Nico had placed a hand on her back and had gently led her away. It was a simple and harmless gesture, but Nico wasn't one to touch others. The intimacy of the gesture was immense and she was still convinced that Nico had either a history with Vera or was having an affair with her now.

She leaned against the wall next to Matt's office, knowing that he was still in his bathroom and would need a while to come out. It was so unprofessional what they were doing that she could barely believe she was a part of it. It was late and it was unlikely that anyone was still around but that hardly made her feel better.

From a door further down the hallways she suddenly heard how the volume of a song was rising and rising. So they weren't alone after all. Slowly she walked towards the familiar song and looked through the glass door. Nico was sitting in his large leather chair, the remote still in hand. His head was resting against the headrest and his eyes were closed. He looked so concentrated that she wondered if he was meditating.

_Our love is questioned, such a mournful sound__  
__Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground__  
__So I like to keep my issues drawn__  
__But it's always darkest before the dawn_

_Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh whoa__  
__Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh whoa__  
__And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back__  
__So shake him off, oh whoa_

She knocked on the door before she opened it, knowing he wouldn't hear her. When she stepped in he must have felt her presence or a draft- either way he opened his eyes and looked at her.

"Didn't know you liked that song. I would have taken you more for a Dobie Gray kind of guy," she teased and smiled softly, knowing of his little singing stunt with the Coach, as he turned down the volume.

"No, I like that song," he just said without giving anything away that she didn't already know.

"Can I come in?" she asked then, still with the smile on her face.

"Of course, Doctor," he smiled back and sat up straight as he motioned for her to sit down on the sofa in his office.

"What are you still doing here?" she asked him after she had taken the offered seat.

"Listening to music," he replied, but she only had to raise her eyebrows and he gave her another answer. "Watching videos," he said and switched the screen on that showed the halted image of TK in the locker room as he dropped his towel in front of the reporter.

"What are you looking for?" Dani asked, knowing Nico wouldn't watch the video because he wanted a repeat performance of TK showing off his assets.

"I'm trying to find out if he's really lying or if he simply can't remember everything about that event."

"He's forgetting an awful lot these days and has some weird mix-ups," Dani nodded. She had wondered the same thing.

"I've seen this too often, but I guess I don't want to believe that he's already that deep in," he sighed and tiredly wiped with one hand over his face.

"I guess in your line of work painkillers are a real problem," she said. He dealt with athletes all the time and god knew who he dealt with in his free time.

"I'm not sure but I think he's either already taken to other drugs or he soon will be. You can only get so many painkiller pills before someone notices. And after a while they don't do anymore and you need something else."

"Are you talking about yourself?" Dani gasped because of the way he had spoken.

"No," he shook his head, "Juliette Pitmann," he clarified. Silence spread between them until Dani broke it. "She started with sleeping pills."

"What are we gonna do with TK?" she asked.

"Aren't you the therapist? All I can do is handcuff him and throw him into some locked up basement room until he's clean," Nico offered.

"I will come back to that offer when nothing else helps," Dani grinned, but then turned serious again. "However as a therapist I can't help someone who doesn't want my help. So far I don't think that TK sees that he has a problem. And until he does, my hands are bound."

"I know," Nico nodded and let out a long breath that sounded suspiciously like a sigh. "We should go home, it's late," he added and stopped the video that was playing. The window closed on the TV and another one showed up behind it, showing an overview of all the feeds of the security cameras in the building and on the facility.

"There are cameras in the offices?" Dani gasped shocked. She and Matt had 'met' several times in his office when they had thought everyone else was gone and now it turned out that someone could produce a nice home video with it? She concentrated on breathing, she knew otherwise she would most likely start hyperventilating.

"Yes, they turn on every evening after eight when everyone is supposed to be gone," Nico confirmed and grimly looked at the feed that showed that Matt was just leaving his office. The way he looked at Matt and the section of the screen that showed Matt's office let her know that he had seen the videos and knew what was going on.

"Oh my god," she said and was glad that she was sitting or her legs wouldn't have held her anymore.

"There's a hotel close by, for further notice. The concierge is a quiet man... Ms. Dade likes staying there," Nico advised. Dani couldn't be more mortified or embarrassed.

"No, it won't be necessary," she stuttered and was surprised herself at the sudden tears that stung her eyes. She would not cry now, there was no reason to. She sniffed twice and then got a grip on her emotions. Bravely she looked up at Nico and even managed a little smile.

"What are you doing Dani?" Nico exclaimed suddenly and so vehemently that it was totally out of character for him, as was the use of her first name.

"I don't know," she shrugged, her smile getting wobbly. "But I know that it has to end."

"Sometimes you have to go back before you can move forward," he told her quietly and more controlled again. She smiled when she remembered that she had very recently used the exact words.

"Does that apply to you and Vera as well?" she asked, because she still wanted to know if they had a history and now seemed like a good time to ask when they were both so open for once.

"No," he shook his head, "no history there. How's your son?" he asked then.

"Better. I'm just happy he made it to college," she said and a proud smile appeared on her face. "Have you heard from Marshall?"

"No, but Gabrielle called me last week. Apparently she doesn't like the league officials hanging around here." The sentence seemed so harmless but Dani knew what it implied. Gabrielle had her sources and knew about Nico and Vera and she didn't like it.

"How did that go?" she asked simply, although the whole thing was a damn mess.

"It will still take a while until she will understand that I don't compromise myself for anyone and I never lie," he shrugged and Dani was surprised by his nonchalance. Her face gave her thoughts away and before she could comment and Nico shrugged. "I guess after all these years I'm simply not in love with her anymore." On one hand Dani liked his answer, liked it a lot because it meant that he could finally be happy with someone else. On the other she didn't like it, because she wondered if Vera was the cause for his sudden awareness. She didn't dare to ask. "Although I have to admit that I kind of lied last night," he said then and the fake seriousness on his face made her already suspect something.

"What did you do Mr. Careless?" she asked curiously and stopped her pondering on Nico's love life.

"I called a tow-truck and had the car of the GM towed off, because he used the parking space for disabled," he said with a mischievous look on his face.

"Where's the lie in that?" she asked.

"I switched the signs before," he grinned and made her laugh out loud. He laughed with her and explained the whole situation to her. It was good to laugh so freely together and Dani had some witty remarks to the whole situation. When their laughter died down they were looking at each other with smiles on their faces. They were somewhat partners in crime now and that made for a certain closeness, even though he was still on his chair and she still on the sofa. The usual electricity sparked between them once more, but this time it felt more comfortable and less forbidden.

"I really liked the song," she said after a while and referred to the song that he had muted when she had come in.

"It is good," he stressed with a smile and started the song again before he leaned back in his chair again and closed his eyes once more. The smile didn't leave his face and mirrored the one Dani wore as she lay down on the couch and closed her eyes to enjoy the song, before she would go back home and return to the real world.

_And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back_  
_And given half the chance would I take any of it back_  
_It's a fine romance but it's left me so undone_  
_It's always darkest before the dawn_

_**TBC**_


	5. No hay mas

**Sorry, it took me so long to update, but I wanted to wait for this weeks episode and I think it was good that I did. Basically I did a 50% re-write of what I already had so that it would fit with the last epi and the last Nico-files.**

**Amazing episode and I can't wait for next week. So excited.**

**Hope you like the chapter and thank you so much for your reviews!**

* * *

**Chapter 5**

**No hay màs...**

Nico found himself in a deserted parking space, leaning against his car, a guitar in hand while he played the notes of a mariachi song. The last time he had had a quiet moment like this he had been standing in Danis kitchen with a cup of coffee in his hands and had listened to her laughter...

_What they had suspected for a while had now become the horrible truth: TK was hooked on painkillers and the small glass with the flush-out showed that he was in deeper than any of them had suspected. They were both staring at the pills again, still in her office and both at a loss what to say. Dani sighed deeply and looked up at Nico, hoping that he would show his usual confidence and assure her with it that he had everything under control. Nothing ever got past Nico, right? And he would help her make this better. After all he had believed her and had searched TKs apartment for her, when even Matt didn't believe in her abilities anymore after the drug test had been negative._

_"Thank you, Nico," she said, her eyes still fixed on his face._

_"For what are you thanking me?" he looked honestly confused._

_"For searching TKs apartment and finding proof that I am right."_

_"I never thought I'd see the day when you would thank me for one of my 'tricks'," he replied and gave her a small smile._

_"Neither did I," she chuckled and bumped his shoulder with hers. "You want some coffee?"_

_"Coffee sounds good," he nodded and as the smile vanished from his face she realized how exhausted he looked. She bit her tongue to not comment on it, because she knew that if she asked him anything personal, like for how long he was up, he would leave._

_"Then come on into the kitchen," she motioned with her head and walked ahead out of her office and away from the horrible proof of TKs troubles. " What do you want? Espresso, Cappuccino, Latte Macchiato?" she asked and the way she talked intended that he could have basically everything with coffee._

_"Double Espresso, with sugar," he said and leaned against the kitchen counter across from her._

_"Huh, I figured you more for a 'coffee black' kind of guy," she teased him. He grinned at her attempts to bait him and lightly shook his head. He could either not reply and avoid everything remotely personal again or he could reply and give her just a tiny bit more of personal information- which he knew was dangerous in her hands. He was too tired to keep avoiding everything and he always liked her reaction when he gave her personal information, so he decided to humor her._

_"No, I like my coffee sweet. Just as I like sweets, they've always been my weakness," he said and was rewarded with the reaction he had been hoping for. Her eyes widened in surprise, then she gasped and gaped at him before a large smile lit up her face._

_"Who would have thought," she smiled, " that something so mundane would be your Achilles heel. Sadly I don't have anything here, because the pregnant lady in the house ate it all."_

_"Actually, I think I can help with that," he said smartly and then left the room. "Just a second," he told her as he left the kitchen and then the house. She heard his car door close before he came back in. Dani was just putting the two cups of java down on the kitchen counter when he entered the kitchen- not that she could see him behind all these blue boxes he had stacked up so high that his upper body and face disappeared behind them._

_"Nico, what is this?!" she laughed when she saw him and rushed over to him to help him put the boxes down on the kitchen table._

_"Cookies," he said, still hidden behind the packets of cookies._

_"Are you the cookie monster or where did you get this insane amount of cookies?" Dani laughed and it struck Nico that in that second she looked carefree and only amused about the situation. For the moment TK and all the other problems were forgotten and Nico consciously decided that he would keep her in this state for as long as possible._

_"I may make as much of a mess when I eat cookies, but the last time I checked I wasn't blue and furry," he replied with a teasing smile. Dani started laughing again and opened one of the boxes and took a cookie out._

_"They may look and smell like cardboard, but they actually taste pretty good," he shrugged, still smiling. She smiled back over the kitchen counter and took a bite, then nodded approvingly._

_"Mmmmhh... not bad," she said and closed the box again before she could be tempted to eat more. Then she handed him the cup. "Here, drink your coffee before it gets cold."_

_"Thank you." He took the coffee and slowly sipped while she did the same with hers after she had come around the corner and leaned against it while standing next to him._

_"You still haven't told me where you got them," she said after a moment of comfortable silence._

_"I bought them from a cheeky girl scout who busted me while I was sneaking around TKs apartment," he admitted and had hoped to avoid TKs name for a while longer. The amusement won over the sorrows though and he found Dani chuckling into her coffee cup beside him._

_"Big, bad mystery man busted by a girl scout? You didn't make her disappear, did you?" she asked._

_"No, she would have beat the crap out of me," he replied and attempted to look scared at the memory and was rewarded with more laughter._

_"Did she have blonde ringlets?" the doctor laughed._

_"Hey, don't laugh at me. She was scary and sharp like a knife," he mock-defended himself._

_"What will we do now with TK?" she changed the topic suddenly, but still with the smile on her face, like she refused to let go of the happiness just yet._

_"I will talk to Donnelly and show him that you were right."_

_"Will you tell him where and how you got the pills?" she asked._

_"I won't tell him that you asked me to get the evidence," he answered her unspoken question._

_"I don't care if he knows I am behind this, but Matt might let something slip unintentionally. He's not good at keeping secrets," Dani said without judging. _

_"I know," he nodded._

_"Thank you for believing in me, Nico," she told him and it occurred to her that recently she had thanked him an awful lot and should have thanked him even more._

_"I never doubt your professional abilities," he replied and tried to make this less personal._

_"Another coffee?" she asked and changed the topic, because it hurt just a bit that he couldn't even accept her thanking him when it got too personal. Damn his walls!_

_"No, I should get going. I still have some things to take care of," he said and put the cup down in the sink._

_"Ok, see you tomorrow," Dani said disappointedly._

_"Goodbye doctor," Nico nodded once and then was gone. Dani looked over to the packages of cookies and sighed. Why was everything so complicated?_

That moment seemed decades ago. He hadn't heard her laugh since then, but he had seen her cry. And it haunted him.

Ever since he had learned about the bugs he had tried to do damage control, find the bugs and find out who had installed them. But once the reporter had talked about tapes recorded in a doctors office and he had understood that Dani had been compromised as well...to say that he was furious and desperate was an understatement. He had always done everything in his power to protect her and to never let her down. He understood how important her job was to her and when she had started dating Donnelly he had pulled away from her, ignoring how much it hurt him. He just wanted to see her happy, it was as simple as that.

He knew it would break her when he had gone to her house to tell her that her office had been bugged and he had been prepared that she blamed him for it, because after all it had been his job to protect her and her patients. What he hadn't expected was how much it would hurt him when she doubted his ability to fix it. That's what he does: fix things. And she had doubted him, had lost her trust in his abilities and in him. Maybe, he wondered, maybe she had never trusted him in the first place.

_"Why? How did that happen?" she asked wide eyed and shocked._

_"I'm gonna find out whoever did this and recover all the tapes before they go public."_

_"Don't you get it?! The damage has already been done. My practice, no, my patients, they could all wake up tomorrow and every single secret, intimate thing that they have ever shared in here could be splattered all over the internet."_

_"That is not gonna happen!"_

_"How do you know that?"_

_"Because I'm not gonna let it. Not to the Hawks, not to you."_

_"This team has compromised me in ways that I never even knew existed. I need you to go please."_

She had only seen him as part of the team. Not as her co-worker, friend or even partner in crime. He had been the team for her that night and he had been guilty and not to be trusted. In a way he understood it, but it still hurt.

He had left her office that night, left her, and had gone off to lick his wounds while drinking a Scotch and staring out into the night.

The talk with Vera had helped. She knew that he wasn't joking when he had said "over my dead body". He had always been loyal to Marshal and he had always protected his friend. But he had to decide between his loyalty to Dani and his loyalty to Marshal and Vera made him understand that he had chosen a long time ago. It wasn't even a question or a decision he made consciously. He chose Dani and he would always choose her.

_"I'm not used to making mistakes."_

_"Nico, I think you're being too hard on yourself."_

_"I don't like letting people down."_

_"People? You mean Dani. Your friend."_

_"Yeah"_

His friend. If he had ever doubted that Dani was so much more to him than his friend, then he had learned differently that night when he had gone to her with the tapes. He had hoped that bringing her the tapes would ease her mind a bit and also make her trust him again. But Dani was smart and when she had talked about copies he had to tell her the truth.

_"Who has the originals?"_

_"Marshall Pittman"_

_"But Marshall Pittman is...There is no telling what that man will do with those tapes."_

Her tears had hurt him and he had felt guilty. It was his fault that she was breaking down right in front of him and he couldn't do anything. He had wanted to hurry to her, take her in his arms and tell her that everything would be ok. But it would have been a lie and he never lied. Still, seeing this strong woman so shaken and scared was painful. As he had stood there watching her cry on her couch... he couldn't remember ever feeling this helpless and he was frozen to the spot.

_"Oh my god, would you please leave I wanna be alone!"_

The sheer panic in her voice had shaken him out of his daze and he had known that that "over my dead body" wouldn't be an empty threat. He would find Marshall, he would get these tapes and all copies and he would destroy them at whatever cost. He would make her feel save again and if Marshall would kill him or have him killed afterwards then so be it. But he would make sure that she wouldn't feel helpless and alone again. He had never let her down and he wouldn't start now. She should know that she was his first priority, before the Hawks and certainly before Pittman. She had become all that mattered and he decided that it was the right moment that she knew that.

_"No. Dani, I've never let you down and I don't intend to start now. I will get those tapes back. Look at me! Look at me! You're not alone!"_

When she had fully turned her head and had moved closer towards him, her eyes suddenly on his lips, he knew that she had understood everything he had said- and everything he hadn't said.

He wanted to lean in, close the space between them and kiss her until she forgot all about tapes and about TK. But there was too much at stake. He looked at her lips and knew that if he would kiss her he couldn't deal with it if she regretted it the next day or a week from then. If he kissed her he wanted to keep kissing her. He pulled away and got up when it finally registered in his brain that he didn't simply have a crush on the cute doctor. He loved her.

Walking away from her while she was sitting crying and broken in her office had been a hard thing to do, but necessary. He had stopped and looked back, tempted to rush back in and be her hero for the moment or the night. He left, knowing that he couldn't face the consequences of her regretting such a night.

He looked down at the guitar in his hands and stopped playing. He should get going. He had a job to do and he needed to be well rested to do it. Once he had done it and once she was happy again, then maybe he could offer her his heart... it was all he had.

**No hay màs que solo el corazon que tengo...**

**TBC**


	6. Grieve

**You didn't really think that now that there are no more Nico files I would let you hanging with this story? The fun is just starting now that I can go off completely where I want to...**

**This is my take on last night and from here on the story will go into AU territory.**

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**Chapter 6: Grieve**

Marshall Pittman was dead. At first Dani couldn't believe it, but as she looked at Nico and saw how sad he looked , she knew it was true. She had been sitting outside, grieving for Mr. Fishy when he had come over with the tapes. Or actually she had been grieving for everything that had gone wrong recently when he had come over with the tapes. She grieved for her lost marriage and for Ray because he was so irresponsible. She grieved for her and Matt's relationship that was clearly over now and left her with a feeling of loneliness. He had always been her friend to call when she needed someone to talk to and now she couldn't do that anymore. She grieved for Jeanette who was halfway around the world and who she couldn't call anymore either. For TK who had a long time ahead of him in rehab and who had just lost another friend. And for herself because she had never felt so alone and helpless as she had recently. If it hadn't been for Nico, she wouldn't know what she had done. And now she had to add another name to the list: Nico. However she hadn't lost him, he was right here beside her, but she was grieving _with_ him.

"You lost your friend." Nico had looked sympathetic when he had seen Mr. Fishy and his sympathy had allowed Dani to wallow in her self-pity a moment longer. Until he had spoken again.

"So did I," he said and she saw that it took everything he had to get his emotions back under control. Why did he always have to do this? His struggle against the tears was what made her believe that it was true more than anything else, although it took her a moment to get out of her stupor. "They found his body," Nico shook his head in disbelieve... refusing to believe when he knew better. "Marshall _is _dead."

"Oh my god," she whispered when it finally registered in her brain what he was telling her and what it meant for him. He had just lost his best friend and was now sitting beside her staring at his hands, controlling his emotions as if he still believed what little boys were told: 'Men don't cry'. She put the fish bowl away and pulled him into a hug and for a split second she wondered how easy that had been. It seemed like he really needed it. "Nico, I'm sorry," she told him, because it was all she could do while she hugged him, "I'm sorry." Then she closed her eyes and let herself be held just as much as she held him.

"He was the only one who knew me," Nico spoke quietly as he held her just a bit tighter. Her eyes opened when he spoke again. "Except you." It was a statement that made her pull back. She didn't completely let go of him, her hand was still resting on his back as she looked at him and thought that he looked somewhat scared. He was scared because he had just admitted something to her that he believed to be true. However she didn't. She didn't know him, not in her book. But that wasn't why she had to disagree with him. What he was telling her was as close to a declaration of love as it got with Nico. And he just couldn't love her. And she couldn't love him.

"I don't... know you," she disagreed softly as the hand formerly resting on his arm slowly made its way up to his chest. Nico looked puzzled now. Did he really believe that she knew him?

He nodded, then shook his head as he spoke, totally convinced by what he was telling her, "Yeah... you do." She thought about arguing back, insisting that she didn't... but then she saw the look in his eyes and remembered that he never lied. She knew him... He thought she knew him. He thought he loved her, absolutely believed it. She couldn't say who had started but next they pulled each other closer, the hand on his chest cupped his cheek and she felt his breath on her face. They stopped, both thinking about pulling back and stopping this, just like the week before. Their eyes met briefly and they saw that they both wanted this kiss... needed it. They closed their eyes as their lips met hesitatingly, both still afraid of what they were doing. Then Dani let go of the fear and gave herself to the feeling of kissing him. It felt amazing and right. He kissed her softly and she felt cherished and loved. Certainly not alone anymore. She pulled back a bit and slung both arms around his neck when she felt him hesitate again. It worked and he wrapped his arms around her as well, held her tight and pulled her more into him as the kiss became more intense. She had to stretch so her fingertips could still touch his hair as he sat up straight on his side of the bench they were sitting on and pulled her over with him. His left hand was in her hair, messing it up as the other rested on her back and held her to him. The kiss went on and deepened and the contentment of just kissing him vanished slowly but steadily. She wanted to touch him more and the feeling of his hair against her hands wasn't enough. Neither was his chest pressed against hers. Or the hand resting on her back. When they broke the kiss they were both breathing heavily, but didn't let go of each other. They had a decision to make if they wanted to take this further that night or not. However talking about it was awkward and not talking about it would make it even more awkward in the long run... Dani's thoughts started to run a mile a minute and she felt like her head was spinning when Nico stopped it by placing a single soft kiss on her lips and then pulling back. His right hand was still resting on her back and his arm halfway wrapped around her shoulder, but he pulled back so she couldn't feel his breath on her skin anymore. She missed him immediately and leaned back in, but Nico directed her with the hand on her back so she was resting her head against his shoulder. It was comfortable and warm there and although the questions about the kiss and what they were doing were still burning in her mind, she kept her mouth shut for once and followed Nico's lead, knowing she could trust him.

"What are you gonna do with the dead fish?" he asked calmly and she wondered for a second if she had just imagined everything. She checked by licking her lips and could still taste him there. So she knew the kiss had actually happened.

"I don't know. Lindsay doesn't know yet. She's gonna be devastated. He was her friend, too," Dani replied and sniffed, which made Nico pull her against him even tighter.

"They want to autopsy Marshall's body because they aren't sure yet why the plane crashed and what he died of. Juliette will have to deal with the funeral arrangements and I don't think Gabrielle will help her. I have to check the contracts and talk to the lawyers to know what will happen to the team now..." Nico listed and Dani knew he was making a plan in his head so he could avoid the emotional pain he was feeling. He couldn't let himself grieve.

"It never ends," she sighed and knew that he would understand what she meant. Their list of things that needed fixing never seemed to end. There was always something or someone to take care of. It never stopped. She felt him nodding against her before he buried his nose in her hair for a second.

"Why did you kiss me?" he asked her then, still in the same quiet, calm tone.

"I don't know," she shrugged, knowing all she could give him was the truth. "It felt right."

"Yeah," he nodded again, "it did. But I don't want you to avoid me because it _will_ feel awkward tomorrow."

Dani looked up at him and met his eyes with hers. "I won't." To prove it she placed a soft kiss on his cheek and then snuggled back into his arms.

"Forgive many things in others, nothing in yourself," Nico said suddenly against her hair and interrupted the comfortable silence. She was lost and didn't know what he was talking about.

"What?"

"My favorite quote. You asked for it on facebook," he enlightened her and made her smile, even though she was still in such a strange and mellow mood.

"I just knew you had one," she smiled and glanced up at him. She was relieved to see that for the moment a flicker of amusement was back in his eyes. Grieve comes on waves, she knew and for the moment his had ebbed and she wanted to keep it that way. "I also asked you for your favorite book and favorite music," she reminded him and decided not to comment on how wrong she found his favorite quote.

"The Alchemist- Paulo Coelho and music depends on my mood. No jazz, though. I hate jazz," he replied and made her giggle when he shuddered at the thought of jazz music.

"If I pump you for more information right now will you answer all of my questions?" she asked cheekily.

"Probably," he said barely above a whisper and she knew the sadness was back. The moment of tentative bantering was over and the vulnerability back. Strangely enough she felt the same way.

"Have you talked to Juliette yet?" Dani asked and adjusted her position so she could see his face.

"I was the one who told her that her father is dead."

"How did she take it?"

"She said that she doesn't believe me and hung up on me." He looked so sad and lost that second that Dani was overwhelmed by tenderness for him.

"Oh Nico," she simply whispered and cupped his cheek again.

"She doesn't want to see me," he added.

"She will calm down and then I'm sure she wants to see you. From everything you told me Juliette loves you very much and once she has gotten over the shock she will need you," she assured him.

"I think I'm gonna take a quick break, get away for a week or two until everything has calmed down. I can't work like this," he told her and took a deep breath before he pulled away from her.

"Oh god, a vacation sounds amazing," Dani sighed, missing the body contact with him. He opened his mouth, stopped himself and closed it again. Then he cocked his head to the side, looked her in the eyes and seemed to make a decision.

"Then come with me, Dani." The way he said her name gave her goose bumps. Immediately Dani had pictures of him and her kissing, undressing and touching on a beautiful beach in front of her inner eye. It was so tempting, but a bad idea.

"I can't," she shrugged and hoped she wouldn't have to explain it more.

"If you can't because you feel like you are needed here or because you need to be here then I wholeheartedly agree. But if you don't want to come because of the kiss...," he took her hands in his as he spoke, "I'm not asking you to come with me because I want you to make me feel better or that we can use each other to make us feel better. I'm not looking for someone to have sex with. I am asking you as a friend if you want to come away with me for a while to simply relax. Nothing more and nothing less," he clarified and she suddenly felt stupid for assuming that he wanted to sleep with her. It was just a kiss... just one teeny tiny kiss and nothing more would ever happen... oh how she hated that thought, as much as it made her feel relieved. However going away with Nico for a week or so, simply relaxing, being quiet together, talking walks and drinking wine...God, that would be good.

"Ok," she agreed before she could stop herself or think about it some more. It was what she needed and she would travel with a friend.

"Ok, I'll pick you up Wednesday at seven am. Be ready," he said and got up.

"Where are we going?" she asked him, because he hadn't mentioned it once.

"You'll see," he told her and was back to his secretive answers. "Just one thing: If you keep talking in the car for three hours straight again, I will lock you into the trunk and duct tape your mouth shut," he threatened. If Dani didn't know him she wouldn't know he was joking.

"Same answer Nico: Have you met me?!" she asked and grinned as he rolled his eyes and got up.

"See you Wednesday Dani,"

"Wednesday Nico," she said and only realized that she had still been holding his hand when he walked away and she had to let go.

**TBC**

**And? Agree or disagree with my take on things?**


	7. Silence

**Once again I worked a song into this story. The lyrics are a translation of a German song that I was listening to over and over while writing chapter 6 and this chapter. It set the mood for the chapters so to say. You can find the name of the band and the song at the end of the chapter. Listen to it, you've got the translation now, and feel it and you'll get the feeling for this chapter and the last one. Read it while listening to the song and tell me if it worked for you. ;)**

**Chapter 7: Silence**

_You show me, that silence has become your friend now_

The few days between their decision to go away together and the day of their departure Dani spent preparing for the trip. Nico hadn't given anything away as to where they were heading and that made packing so much harder. He had let it slip though that they would drive and she knew that any destination that made sense in a driving distance wouldn't be too warm. So she had packed her bikini as well as a few summer dresses and skirts but mainly she had packed jeans and long sleeved pullovers and jackets.

She had also arranged for the kids to live with their father and she had slightly wondered why Ray Jay had been so indescribably happy about it. Something was up and she knew it, but she just didn't have the energy to deal with it at this point. Maybe it was time for Ray to grow up and take care of his kids for once and be more than a partner in crime. Lindsay hadn't been as happy, but in the end she was ok with living with her dad for a few days. Dani hadn't told them where she would go or who she would be with, because she wasn't ready to open that can of worms. She had no idea what went on with her and Nico after the kiss or if something was going on at all. They had just gotten over the shock of their mother dating Matt and they surely didn't need to know that she had kissed Nico. Especially because for them Nico was the creepy security guy who stopped by in the middle of the night and always knew things he shouldn't know. She wasn't even sure if they had met him after he had busted them for selling the merchandise stuff back then.

And they also didn't need to know how nervous she was about this trip. She hadn't slept since the day they had made the arrangement and had had her cell phone in her hands more than once to call him and cancel. Then she always reminded herself of his words that the kiss wouldn't matter and that they would just go away together as friends. Just friends. She just wasn't sure anymore that what she was feeling for him had anything to do with being friends. She had suspected it back when he had obviously had a thing with Vera- she made a mental note to ask him about it when the opportunity arose- and since the kiss those feelings hadn't diminished or vanished. In fact it was quite the opposite. Knowing that he obviously cared about her very much, possibly loved her, didn't help matters. It gave her nervous flutters and daydreams that were far beyond and PG rating. She could admit that she was attracted to Nico, but didn't know how it could be more.

So when Nico pulled into her driveway that Wednesday morning not only did she have way too many bags, but she was nervous and over tired as well. For the first hour she babbled about everything and nothing, including the color of her shoes and the new nail artist who had done her nails while Nico listened and remained silent. When he stopped at the side of the road after an hour, called her name and showed her a roll of duct tape she fell silent immediately- after laughing about his dry sense of humor and with a warm and fuzzy feeling when he smiled as well- and fell asleep shortly afterwards.

Nico looked over at her sleeping form and reached over to gently adjust her head so she wouldn't wake up with an aching neck. He had been surprised when she had agreed to come with him after the kiss. It showed him just how much she trusted him and he felt humbled by it. And he would do everything not to let her down. He wondered what went on in her head and in her heart. He had known for while now that he loved her, but it had shocked him when he had found out recently how much. He had been able to deal with her being with Donnelly by avoiding both of them as much as possible. After all he had practice in living with a broken heart and jealousy, because he had done it for years after Gabrielle had married Marshall. How had Dani put it? He had taken a bullet for Marshall by letting Gabi go. That's why he couldn't risk getting involved with Danielle when he knew that she wasn't sure yet what she felt and who she wanted. As long as Matt was still somewhere in the periphery of her mind he couldn't risk it. For one he wasn't ready to take a bullet for Donnelly. And he also knew that now that Marshall was dead, losing Dani wouldn't be taking a bullet. It would be his kill shot.

For the moment he was content in having her beside him and having the prospect of spending a whole week with her away from everything, even if it was just as friends. Sometimes friends were closer than lovers and in all honesty it was all he could deal with at the moment. He needed to calm down, get over Marshalls death and Juliette's rejection and then get everything in order for the Hawks... only then he would be able to think about a relationship. He needed time and rest and so did she. And that's what they would get.

His mood wasn't a happy one though- the reason why he couldn't deal with Dani's nervous chatter. He felt exhausted and anxious at the same time. He felt like a strange silence and noise had entered his life at once and he didn't know how to deal with them at the same time. Nothing was in order anymore and certainly not how it should be.

He pressed a few buttons and played a song on repeat and a bit louder than the others before. It was a song he had heard two years back in a bar in Berlin, Germany when he had been in Europe. He had ended it with Gabrielle in Paris the night before and then had taken the next flight to Berlin to drown his sorrows there. He knew the city and by chance he had attended the concert of a not so well known band and had bought the CD afterwards. Nico spoke the language well enough to understand the lyrics and they described so well what he was feeling at the moment and the tempo of the song matched his mood.

_So silent,*_

_that each of us knew_

_this here is forever-_

_forever and a lifetime._

_And it was so silent,_

_that everyone of us suspected that_

_there's no word_

_that can ever describe the feeling._

_So silent that all clocks fell silent,_

_yes, the time came to a halt,_

_so silent and so lost you went away,_

_so silent and so lost you went away._

_I've heard so much and yet I never understand._

_That is the reason why I cannot sleep at night._

_Even if I write a thousand songs about missing you,_

_it does not mean that I understand_

_why this feeling lasts forever._

_So loud, the hours after the impact as it counted._

_To grasp and understand it all._

_And it was so loud _

_that every thought brought us nothing but emptiness._

_So loud and so lost it was here_

_when silence lived with us instead of you._

_So silent, even though I miss you every day_

_and wherever you are,_

_you show me, that silence has become your friend now._

"Mmmh, what song is that?" Dani mumbled two hours into their drive.

"A German one," he replied quietly," Go back to sleep."

"Okay," was all she said and did as he had told her and Nico went back to his thoughts as he drove. He still couldn't believe Marshall was dead. He shook his head and to get the thoughts of Marshall out of his head. Then he looked over at Dani and didn't feel as lost anymore when he saw her next to him. He just really hoped that he could keep himself from becoming weak again where she was concerned. Keeping his distance while still being her friend. It wasn't easy to just sit next to her and watch her sleep when he wanted to touch her hair, stroke her cheek or kiss her awake. Even more so because he knew she would probably let him and smile at him once she opened her eyes. However he never wanted to see regret in them once she had time to think about her actions.

Another two hours later he parked the car in front of the house he had booked for them. It was a white house, not too big and right at the beach. The owner was already waiting for them outside on the porch.

"Mr. Careles?" the older man asked when he got out of the car.

"Yes, you must be Mr. Jones," Nico replied and they shook hands.

"Did you have a save drive?" the owner asked politely.

"Yes, thank you very much. We made it in a bit over four hours," he said and stretched his stiff legs a bit.

"I hope you like the house. If you need anything or have any questions please don't hesitate to call me or my wife any time. You can find the number in the kitchen, pinned to the fridge."

"Thank you," Nico said again and took the offered key.

"Seems like the trip exhausted your wife," Mr. Jones laughed when he saw Dani still sleeping in the car.

"She has a stressful job," Nico said without correcting him. There was simply no reason to.

"Then have a pleasant stay and greet your wife from me," he said before he walked over to his car and drive off again. Nico looked back at Dani and thought about waking her immediately, but decided against it. He would check the house first and then wake her up. He unlocked the door and stepped inside. The door opened to a wide living room held in grey and white. He walked over to the large windows that led out to a patio. Already from the windows he could make out the sea. The living room and the patio looked more liked they belonged to a small Irish cottage and which was exactly why he had rented this house. He threw a quick look into the large kitchen that also had a door out to the patio and checked the fridge to see if they had anything to eat and to drink and then went into the other direction to check the bedrooms. There was one downstairs and when he saw it he knew that Dani would love it. It was bright and homey, with a walk in closet and a large modern bathroom, that had one beautiful bathtub in the middle of the room. Back outside in the hallway he walked back into the living room and took the stairs up to the second bedroom. It was smaller, with a small balcony and its own bathroom. It also had a desk in it and when Nico checked he saw that he had internet connection here. His room.

It was time to wake sleeping beauty and so he walked back outside to the car and gently shook her awake. She blinked a few times before she woke up fully and then looked around her and tried to understand why she was in a car.

"Nico? Why does it smell like the sea?" she asked him and looked up at him. "Where are we?"

"Newport," he let her know and waited until she had unbuckled and then helped her out of the car.

"God, I'm so tired," she said and then yawned widely as she stumbled beside him into the house.

"You can go back to sleep in a second. Your bedroom is on the left side, second door," he let her know and went back out to get the rest of the luggage. Dani was so out of it still that she just walked into the room he had told her, kicked off her shoes and lay down on the bed without brushing her teeth or changing into other clothes. She wasn't hungry or thirsty, she was just tired. When Nico went into her room to bring her her several bags, she was already fast asleep again on top of the covers.

When Dani woke up she was less disoriented and remembered at least walking into the house and going back to sleep. She checked the clock beside her bed and saw that it was five in the afternoon already. When she saw the time she suddenly felt thirsty and hungry at the same time. Also she was curious where exactly she was. She straightened her crumpled shirt and combed with her fingers through her hair before she left her room. It seemed like Nico nearly always saw her when she had just woken up. Usually it was his own fault because nearly always he was the one who woke her up by pounding at her door at ungodly hours.

She walked into the living room and then into the kitchen. It was a beautiful house and she liked it even more when she found the fridge completely stacked with food and drinks. She wondered if Nico had worked his magic once more. She took a bottle of water out and made a plan what to cook before she closed the door again and gulped the small bottle of water down in one go. Pasta with sea fruits and tomato sauce was her choice for dinner and she wondered if Nico would be ok with it. She had no idea where he was but when she walked back into the living room and just wanted to walk outside on the patio she found him lying on the couch, fast asleep.

It wasn't a peaceful slumber like hers had been as his eyes twitched and his face wasn't relaxed at all. He seemed to feel so much anguish that it hurt her just seeing him like this. As quietly as she could she took the blanket from the back of the couch and covered him with it. She expected him to open his eyes and wake up startled and grumpy, but he slept on his fitful sleep. She stood next to the sofa and watched him for a while, but when he flinched in his sleep and mumbled Marshalls name she sat down next to him and gently stroked the errand strands off hair off his forehead. She ran her fingers into his hair like she had done with her children when they had been younger and it seemed to work with Nico as well, as he calmed down in his sleep.

She watched her fingers glide through his hair and wanted to lie down with him, snuggle up to him and sleep until she would wake up in his arms. She pushed the thought away as far as she could, knowing that if she was honest she would feel the same way if Matt was with her. She couldn't understand her own feelings anymore and the only one she could talk to was far away in Barcelona. Why was she suddenly attracted to Nico? Why had the spark that had always been between them ignited? She was still in love with Matt, wasn't she?

She pulled her hand back and decided that it was better not to think about it at that point. Simple tasks and simple thoughts first. Boiling water for the pasta was easy- she could do that. So she went back into the kitchen, but before she went in search for a pot she opened the door out to the patio so the sound of the waves could drown out the silence that surrounded her. She couldn't deal with silence right then.

_So silent, that each of us knew this here is forever-forever and a lifetime_

**TBC**

*Original Song 'Still' by 'Jupiter Jones'


	8. Questions

**When I published my first story in this fandom I thought it was weird that my chapters were suddenly so short. this chapter here is now back to my usual style. I am not sure though if it is what you want to read or what you expected when I sent these two on a trip together. I still hope you like it and you'll keep reading and tell me about your thoughts and questions in he reviews. I will try to answer.**

* * *

**Chapter 8: Questions**

Dani was sitting in the large armchair beside the couch and read a book when Nico woke up. He watched her for a few seconds before he fully opened his eyes and made it known that he was awake. Dani looked up over the rim of her book and smiled slightly when she saw his sleep tousled hair and the one couch imprint he had on his cheek when he sat up slowly and blinked against the light. Nico had noticed where her yes lingered and smoothed down his hair before he rubbed over his face to get the circulation flowing that would wash away the imprint. Dani was still watching him when he dropped his hands and as he became more alert he smelled food.

"Something smells delicious," he told her as he tried to hide the yawn while he spoke.

"I didn't know when you'd wake up. When you weren't up by seven I was so hungry I had to eat. I kept it warm for you in the oven though," she let him know and looked apologetically.

"Thank you. What did you make?"

"Pasta with sea fruits," she informed him. " You want me to sit with you while you eat?" she asked, because she herself hated eating alone.

"I'll just bring it over. But before I have to get changed," he replied and stiffly got up from the couch and disappeared up the stairs. Dani went back to reading her book until he came back down a few minutes later. He didn't acknowledge her as he passed her and walked into the kitchen. But she sure noticed him. She had wondered before the trip if she would ever see him in anything else than a suit and a dress shirt now that they were spending a whole week together. She hadn't been prepared for what it would do to her though when she would. He was dressed in a tight dark blue T-shirt and grey sweatpants that hung low on his hips. Him being barefoot made the whole outfit just so much more casual and sexy. She slowly lowered her book as she followed him with her eyes until she couldn't see him anymore. Once more she was swept away by a daydream of him. Those had started long before the kiss but had gotten so much more real after it. Now she knew what kissing him was like, it was hard to stop thinking about it. She imagined running her hands through his hair as they kissed until they were breathless. While they fought for air she pulled the dark blue shirt over his head and let it drop to the floor right there in the middle of the living-room of their holiday domicile. He pulled her closer again and she couldn't resist gliding her hands over his bare torso as his lips descended on hers once more.

"Thank you for cooking," Nico said as he stepped back into the living room and interrupted her daydream of him. Quickly she checked her mouth if she had been drooling and was relieved to find it wasn't so. At the same time she knew that she was blushing, if the burning feeling on her face was any indication. Nico was so concentrated on his food though that he didn't seem to notice. He had sat down on the couch, placed his plate on the coffee table and wolfed down the pasta. By the time he looked up because she still hadn't said anything he had devoured half of his meal already and she had her emotions back under control.

"You're welcome," she said when he looked expectantly at her.

"What are you reading?" he wanted to know and motioned with his chin in the direction of the book in her lap before he ate another fork full of his meal.

"Book about therapy for patients with substance abuse issues," she let him know and showed him the cover.

"You're just as bad as me. I checked my email while I was upstairs to see if there's anything new."

"We'll never relax this way," Dani knew and thought about it for a second. "How about we make a deal?" she asked him.

"What kind of deal?" he wanted to know and looked curious.

"How about we both stay away from everything work related while we're here. We're both allowed to keep on our cell phones in case there's an emergency, but we're not allowed to call work, check emails, or read books about work," she offered. He contemplated it for a moment and then nodded.

"Ok, deal," he said and then ate the last fork full of pasta. She held out her hand to him, but he kept his eyes on his plate and pretended he didn't see it. Dani squinted, but decided to let it go. While he still chewed he leaned back against the back of the couch, which made the side of his shirt slip up and a bit of skin showed.

"This sure is a change from your usual work attire," Dani couldn't keep herself from commenting on his outfit any longer.

"You're not wearing these suicidal weapons you call shoes either," he teased her. She squinted at him again when he insulted her shoes, but only to hide the amusement.

"I figured you slept upright in a capsule, dressed in your power suit until you step out the next morning fully recharged," she teased him right back and couldn't keep a straight face anymore when he laughed out loud. If he had thought for just a second that she was serious, he wouldn't have been able to laugh about it. But as he had said, she knew him and even if she hadn't seen him in sweatpants and T-shirt before, she still knew that he was far from being an emotionless robot.

"Did you bring any other books?" he asked her then.

"Yes, I did. You want to borrow some?" she asked only half-serious.

"I can't stand chick lit," he said dryly as he got up to bring his plate into the kitchen.

"I don't read chick lit!" she yelled, laughing as she threw a pillow after him that actually hit him in the back. He didn't stop on his way, but when he got back and found her curiously looking in the direction he was coming from, he picked up the pillow and threw it, so it flew to the couch he had been sitting on. He sat down on it again, lay down so he could see Dani and rested his head on the pillow.

"Is your room and the house ok for you?" he asked her seriously.

"It's perfect Nico, thank you," she nodded and placed the closed book on the coffee table. She pulled her feet up to rest on the arm chair and rested her chin on her knees, her arms wrapped around her legs. "How are you feeling?" she asked him then.

He shrugged and looked up to the ceiling instead of at her. "I just lost my best friend." She wanted to ask him to tell her some stories of the two of them together, some happy ones, but she was too afraid the wounds were still too fresh. So she focused on technicalities.

"How long did you know him?"

"About 25 years," he replied but didn't elaborate and changed the topic instead. "Did you hear anything from your friend? She arrived safely?"

"Yes, she called. Everything is fine," she confirmed.

"What about your other friend? The other part of the fearsome threesome?" Nico asked her.

"You mean Margot?" she asked, "she has a new boyfriend and whenever she isn't married yet she drops off the face of the earth and reappears once the ink is dry in the marriage contract," she explained.

"So, you're not as close?"

"We are, just not as close as me and Jeanette," she told him. Just when he wanted to say something more his cell phone rang and when he saw who it was he sat up.

"I've got to take this," he excused himself and walked out of the living room and up the stairs as he answered. He wasn't far away enough once he greeted the person on the other end and Dani still heard his "Hello Vera," before the house swallowed the rest of the conversation. Now that he was up in his room talking to another woman Dani suddenly felt alone. She looked over to the couch where the imprints of Nico's body were still visible. Loneliness was a feeling she could deal with, because she wasn't used to it. She had always had someone beside her. But ever since she and Matt had broken up the last time it had become worse. So bad actually, that she called him in what have become a booty call if he hadn't refused to come over or talk to her. She knew he had been with another woman. It had hurt, it still did, but she was tempted again to call him and if it was only to hear his voice. She looked in the direction of her room where her cell phone lay charging, but then remembered the deal she had with Nico. She wasn't allowed to call anyone as long as it wasn't an emergency. What was wrong with her? Why couldn't she be alone anymore and if it was only for a minute?

She felt restless suddenly, stood up and opened the door out to the patio. She watched the sea from the door and then stepped outside, closing the door behind her. It was too cold to risk getting wet by the sea, so she resisted dipping her toes into the waves. Instead she sat down in the large rocking chair on the patio in the same way she had sat in the arm chair: Knees drawn up to her chest, her chin resting on top of them.

She watched the waves come and go and tried not to think of anything. Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, back and forth... she started to rock the chair in the same rhythm. It wasn't having the soothing effect she had been looking for and instead of nothing, she suddenly felt more alone than ever before. Tears pooled in her eyes and trickled down her cheeks as she watched the waves and kept rocking.

Unbeknownst Dani Nico had finished his call with Vera, who had heard of Marshalls death and had simply wanted to hear if he was ok, and had stepped out onto his balcony. He rested his arms on the railing and took a deep breath, refusing to cry as the call had steered up the grieve he felt. Something caught his eye and when he looked down instead of straight ahead to the sea he saw Dani sitting in the rocking chair, moving back and forth as she watched the waves, crying silently. His first impulse was to rush down and hold her and then find out what was wrong. He didn't though and remained standing on the balcony, watching her cry. He gripped the wooden railing so hard his knuckles turned white as he held onto it so he wouldn't go to her. She was in the same mood he had found her in on the day of their fateful kiss and he was still as vulnerable and still as in love with her. This time there were no kids in the house though and there was no dead fish to distract her. They were alone in this house and it wouldn't help either of them if they had sex to feel better. He reminded himself that if she rejected him afterwards or ended it with him before it even begun, because she was not ready yet for something new or still hung up on Donnelly... he knew it would happen. He knew that if Donnelly called her now and told her that he was next door and ask if she would want to come over, she would find an excuse and be gone a second later. It wasn't that she didn't care for him, he knew she did and he had seen the confusion on her face after the kiss. She was still in love with the trainer, or believed herself to be and he had too much self-respect to be the one to make her feel less heartbroken only to have his own heart shattered when she moved on. Friends, they were friends and they should do nothing to endanger this friendship.

Oh how he wished he could go down to her, hold her, kiss her and make her feel better. That was the problem: He wanted so much more than being her friend that he wasn't sure he could resist, if she offered him more- even if it was only for a night. He held onto the railing but leaned back and stood up straight. He took a deep breath and then tore his eyes away from her and looked back out to the sea, watching the last few rays of sun, before it disappeared behind the waves.

* * *

Nico was up early the next morning and decided to watch the sun rise from the beach. He still wore his sweatpants and shirt, but added a grey woolen vest so he wouldn't be too cold. He didn't know how long he had been sitting on the beach when he heard Dani coming. It must have been a while because the sun was already up high.

"Hey, there you are," she greeted him.

"Good morning," he replied and turned his head to look at her.

"Good morning. I saw you from the windows. I have coffee," she told hi m and handed him a cup before she sat down beside him. The first thing on her mind was that she wanted to ask him what Vera had told him on the phone last night and why she had called. But it was none of her business and she didn't want Nico to withdraw even more from her than he had since the kiss. Sure, he had proposed the trip, but then she hadn't seen him for days and now that they were here he kept his distance. They had always bantered and there had always been some kind of physical contact between them. Sometimes it was just a handshake or a soft punch in the shoulder, other times he rested his hand on the low of her back as they walked beside each other or she would touch his arm while talking. Now he even moved away from her when she sat down beside him.

"Do you want to be alone?" she asked him, because she just had to comment on him moving away from her.

"No," was all he said and took a sip of the coffee she had brought him.

"Do you regret bringing me here with you?" she didn't give up. The thought hurt her, but what was she supposed to think. One moment they were talking and the next he vanished after getting a phone call. And now he didn't want to sit beside her.

"No! Why would you think that?" he asked with wide eyes, clearly shocked.

"You flinched away from me when I just sat down," she told him and kept it to herself that she had also noticed how he had avoided touching her when he had taken the coffee from her hand.

"Sorry," he said. "Marshall's death has me in strange mood," he offered as an explanation. It wasn't a lie, but not the whole truth either. Marshall's death simply left him emotionally too weak to resist her like he usually did. The knowledge that she would most likely not push him away if he kissed her again, didn't help either.

"Oh Nico," she sighed, put her cup of coffee down on the sand and then hugged his left arm with both of hers and rested her cheek on his shoulder. " I wish I could help you somehow."

"You are," he replied but didn't move. He kept his eyes on the sea while the scent of hair filled his nostrils. It was true, she helped him, because he immediately felt better with her snuggled up to him. It was innocent and meant to bring him comfort and as long as he could keep himself from kissing her, everything would be fine.

"Good," she smiled into his wool clad arm and picked up her coffee cup again. It was nice to help him and at the same time feel not so alone anymore, she thought as they sat on the beach and watched the sea while they sipped their coffee.

* * *

"Haha! I win again!" Dani hollered as she won another round of Poker against Nico. They had been playing for a while. After their coffee on the beach they had eaten breakfast, then had read a bit and finally had decided in the afternoon that they could play cards.

"Yes, because you are cheating! You change the rules as you please every five seconds," Nico laughed and threw his cards down on the kitchen table.

"Not true! You're simply a sore loser Mr. Careles," Dani shook her head and pointed a finger at him.

"I am right and you know it," he insisted, still laughing. "What time is it?" he asked her then, knowing she could see the clock on the wall behind him.

"Quarter past four," she let him know.

"What are we gonna do for dinner? You want to cook or should we go out to eat?" he asked her.

"I don't feel much like dressing up. So maybe we could stay here. I can make something if you want," she shrugged.

"Ok, I'll help you. But before I'm gonna go for a run," he decided.

"It's raining," she pointed out and looked disapprovingly at the black clouds that were coming in from the sea.

"It's just a drizzle and I won't be long," he insisted and went up to his room to change. When he came back down she had her head in the fridge and was checking what she could make for dinner.

"How about stew and potatoes?" she asked him without changing her position when she heard him.

"Sounds good. See you later, doctor," he replied from the doorway and was gone a second later, jogging down the beach.

* * *

An hour and a half later Dani was a nervous wreck. She had ruined two nails already by chewing on them, but she didn't care. Ten minutes after Nico had left the house a storm had started that had her scared even inside the house. It was pouring down like the world would come to an end, while flashes lit up the sky and the thunder was so loud she wanted to hide under her bed. Only the fear for Nico kept her pacing the living room, although she jumped every time another flash showed or the thunder rumbled outside.

She had told him that it was raining and she hadn't liked the look of the weather in the first place, but he just had to go. Had she lost her touch as a therapist and missed that he was suicidal now after his friend's death? She remembered them laughing together over their poker game and relived the scene that morning at the beach. Would her last memories of him really always make her wonder why he flinched away from her? Why hadn't she insisted on a real answer when she knew he was avoiding answering her? They had so much to talk about and yet they had remained silent for two days already. What were they thinking?

When the door from the porch to the living room was opened and a dripping Nico rushed inside she looked at him like she was seeing a ghost for a second. Then she rushed over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Thank God, Nico, you're back," she cried before she stepped back, anger suddenly overwhelming her. "Do you have any idea how scared I was? Where the hell have you been?" she yelled at him and hit his chest. Nico didn't reply he just caught her hands with his and let them go again when she stopped yelling. Water was dripping from his hair and his clothes down onto the floor and his skin felt cold under her hands, but Dani didn't care. First she hugged him again and then she pulled back and pressed her lips to his in relieve. He was back, he wasn't dead and she was just so happy to see him. She hadn't lost him. Nico was shocked when her lips were suddenly on his once more and then he was overwhelmed by his feelings for her, as he kissed her back passionately. Dani closed her eyes and clung to him while she let herself be swept away by the kiss. She hadn't thought twice about kissing him, not like the last time. Back then they had both hesitated. She had just acted on an impulse and it was one that made her feel amazing. The butterflies in her stomach were dancing away and her legs got weaker and weaker as he kissed her. Then suddenly, just as quick as it had begun, it was over. She opened her eyes and blinked, not understanding why he wasn't kissing her anymore. His hands were gripping her upper arm and he was holding her away from him. When she saw his face she knew that something was seriously wrong. His face was a mask of anger, while his eyes held an expression of longing and hurt that made her stomach drop.

"I cannot do this!" he said forcefully, his voice loud to her ears although it was nothing more than a hoarse whisper.

She blinked again, trying to make sense of it all."Why?"

"Damn it, Dani! I care too much to be your rebound guy," he spat.

"You're not..." she started, but then stopped. Was he really not? she asked herself. He didn't wait for her to finish her sentence or start a new one.

"Please, doctor, do us both a favor and don't lie to me or to yourself." With that statement he left the living room and hurried up to his room. The slamming sound of his door made Dani jump as she stood in the living room, lost and with more questions than answers.

* * *

When he came back down half an hour later he had showered and changed. he now wore a pair of blue jeans, socks and a white shirt. At first Dani didn't dare to look at him, but she knew she was being chicken. Her biggest fear was to lose him and that wasn't less likely if she kept avoiding looking at him. She was sitting in the middle of couch with her feet tucked underneath her. Nico sat down beside her and surprised her by how close he sat down next to her. It gave her the courage to turn her head and look at him.

"Nico, I'm so..." he held up a hand and stopped her.

"We need to talk," he said and didn't sound angry anymore, but his tone of voice made it clear that he meant business. "And I am not only talking about the two kisses and the attraction between us or possible feelings. But I mean about everything. TK, the team, our jobs, Marshall, Gabrielle and Juliette, your ex-husband, kids and Matt. Everything. And I mean _really_ talk. Otherwise I can't do this here anymore," he said and pointed between the two of them.

"I know," she said quietly. " You're right." She turned her head and focused back on her hands. "But you know that we will probably hurt each other in the process?" she had to warn him.

"I know, but I prefer the truth to anything else," he insisted.

"Yeah me, too. I just don't like asking questions that are hurting you," she admitted and sighed.

"Ok, then we'll start today. But first let's make dinner," he told her and nudged her shoulder softly with his. Uncertainly she looked up at him once more and when she found him giving her a small reassuring smile, she couldn't help but smile back at him.

**TBC**


	9. The deal

**So, as you will see the chapters are getting longer and longer as their silence vanishes. This is the first talk. I think someone reviewed that Nico is being chicken. I bet you won't say that anymore after this chapter. ;)**

* * *

**Chapter 9: The dea**l

Cooking dinner together and then eating it passed in relative silence. They only spoke when needed and only about the task at hand and nothing else. It wasn't uncomfortable, but more like truce. Every word more could set off a discussion they weren't ready to have before they both decided that now was the time to have it. It hadn't been agreed upon that they wouldn't talk, but the dinner making and eating kept their hands busy and gave them time to think about what to say and how to say it.

"You want coffee?" Nico asked while Dani was still drying the dishes.

"Yes, please," she replied and then fell silent again. A thousand thoughts were running through her head as she dried the plate and then put it in the cupboard. As a therapist she knew that sometimes totally honest conversations were the hardest and she wasn't sure she would like very much what Nico would tell her. He had told her already that he cared too much and that he didn't want to be her rebound guy. It hurt her that he thought she would use him in such a way, but at the same time she couldn't totally deny it. She wasn't sure what she was feeling and there was no way around telling him that.

"I'm taking the coffee to the living room," he told her and she knew her time to think was running out. Nervously she put the last pot away and then followed him into the living room where he was sitting on the couch sipping his Espresso. He had put her cup on the table next to where he was sitting, so she took the place on the couch next to him.

"Sooo, shall we begin?" she asked and didn't pick up her cup because she knew her shaking hands would give away how nervous she was. Nico turned his head and looked at her, giving her a brief nod.

"Can I start, because I need to get this out? I don't know if it will make things easier or more complicated, but I need to say this first," he pleaded with her.

"Of course," she said quietly, moved that whatever he had to say to her was so important that he would beg her so he could say it first. It also scared her even more. He placed his hand on her arm for a split second and squeezed it lightly before he got up and walked over to the large windows that went out to the patio and the beach. He had the cup still in his hands and looked outside for a moment, seemed to brace himself for whatever he had to say.

When he finally started speaking it was in a low voice and without looking at her. "I already told you earlier and I think you have known for a while now," he took a deep breath and turned around, facing her, before he went on. "I care a lot about you, Danielle. I don't know when exactly it happened that I wasn't simply intrigued by you anymore, but fell in love with you. I am in love with you," he told her and gave her a moment to fully understand what he had just told her. When her eyes widened and her lips formed a small o he knew that she had heard him. " I have been in love exactly three times before. The first woman was my first real girlfriend and a teenage love. The second one was my wife. Then there was Gabrielle. And now there's you. So far none of these love stories did have a happy ending for me and I can't say that I am happy about it, but I can live with it. My wife divorced me. It wasn't working anymore, for reasons I can tell you about later, if you want to know. Gabrielle was married to Marshall and we both knew that it wouldn't end well. Still, I let myself be strung along. It was my own fault and I am not blaming anyone but myself. However, I cannot do that again. I can let you go and watch you be happy with someone else while still being your friend. It's a hard thing to do, but I can do it. I'd rather have you in my life as a friend than not at all. But I cannot kiss you one day and fear that you will reconcile with Donnelly the next. For me it seems that at the moment you don't really know who you want or what you want. One moment you are my friend and the next you want to be my lover," he stopped and made a point by looking her in the eyes. "If you are with me, you are _with me_." He stopped again and took another deep breath, his voice getting quieter again when he spoke, because he had become more and more insistent during his speech. "I don't want a decision from you here and I am not giving you a dead line either. I just want you to know, so that you can understand why it is so hard for me to have you so close and not be able to kiss you or touch you. Especially knowing that you would probably let me do it and then regret it the next day. I couldn't stand it." Nico was done with his speech. He had just bared everything to her and Dani sat stunned on the couch and thought about what to say. She wanted to run to him and kiss him until he forgot everything as much as she wanted to cry for everything he had just told her.

"I don't know what I'm feeling anymore Nico," she decided to go with the brutal and honest truth. "I am attracted to you. I dream about you and I want to be with you so much at times that I can't help it. That is why I kissed you. I wanted to kiss you, it's as simple as that. I want to hug you and soothe you when you hurt, I want to kiss you good morning and goodbye and I want to snuggle up to you and let you hold me when I hurt. At the same time I miss Matt and the fact that it was the reasonable thing to end our relationship, doesn't mean that I don't love him anymore. I had such a great time with him that at times I am doubting my decision not to have more kids, just so that I would have him in my life again. But that's not how it works. You're the one who always believes in me and who is always there. I trust you with everything I have, my kids lives if it comes down to it. I can't say that for Matt... but I still want him," she shrugged helplessly, her voice shaking under the emotions and her eyes filled with tears.

"Don't cry, Dani," he said and came back to her on the couch.

"I'm just.. so sorry," she said and started to cry for real.

"Hey, come here," he said and pulled her in his arms and held her, rubbing her back until she had calmed down a bit.

"Is this ok?" she asked him and pulled a bit back, still hiccuping.

"It's fine," he assured her and pulled her back in his arms. "I still want to kiss you, but at the moment I have enough self control not to do it. You're hurting," he explained.

"So, I can still get a hug from my old friend Nico at times?" she asked him and pulled back again, this time with a small, shaky smile on her face.

"I'm usually not a big hugger," he smiled back and wiped a last tear away from her cheek, before he tried to pull away.

"See, small gestures like this one make it hard to resist," she told him honestly and kept his hand pressed against her cheek for a moment, by covering his hand with hers.

"Same here, but we wouldn't do us a favor," he pointed out.

"I know," she agreed and let go of his hand. She turned and sat sideways on the couch, her head propped up on her hand against the back of the couch. "Tell me about your first wife," she requested then.

"Well," he said and mirrored her position, "we met just before I joined the Navy. She was a College student at the time. We met at a party, nothing special. Went out for a coffee, then started dating. After a year and a half of dating I proposed and she said yes. She finished her architecture studies while I was climbing the ranks of the Navy. I became a seal when we were married for two years. She wanted kids, a family, but I was gone most of the time. When I was home I was trying to forget what I had seen or done. I wasn't exactly in the right head space for having kids. One day I came home and she told me she was pregnant. It wasn't mine. She had fallen for a colleague and we decided to get a divorce. She married him as soon as we were divorced and they are still married, have three kids, a dog and a nice home," he told his story.

"Weren't you angry that she cheated on you?" Dani asked.

"I couldn't feel much at the time. PTSD had me in its grasp that I didn't feel anything for years. The medication you get as a seal so you're able to do certain ops is also designed to keep you calm and not let you feel much. It didn't help matters," Nico explained.

"Did you still love her?"

"Probably, I don't know. Once I really understood that she was gone she had already re-married and was pregnant with their second child." He talked about it in a way that made it clear that he was over it.

"You're still in contact?"

"From time to time, yes. She's the one who decorated my apartment as an interior designer," he replied. Dani knew that he must still trust her if he let her into his apartment. "What about you and your ex-husband?"

"Oh god," Dani gave him a sarcastic laugh. "I was pregnant before we even really started dating." she said. "First love, teenagers, hormones and a mother who forbid meeting him. Sneaking around behind her back was _so_ romantic," she remembered. "Until I was suddenly pregnant with Ray Jay."

"Oops," Nico grinned and made her giggle.

"Exactly, oops. We got married before Ray Jay came and I was pregnant again before we celebrated our two year anniversary. God, that was a mess," she shook her head. "Two kids playing house with a baby involved and one on the way."

"Did you have any help?" Nico wanted to know.

"Not really. My mother had my younger sister to take care of and Ray was off at College. But maybe it was better that way, because I had to grow up. It made me work harder, so I could still get my College degree, even with two kids. Ray worked at a diner to get some money and I studied at night when the kids were in bed."

"And once you both were done with your education?"

"Financially it got better. We bought the house and could afford a comfortable lifestyle. Emotionally it was... I guess we weren't unhappy but I can't say we were in love. Ray cheated, I buried myself in work and we lived together, but not with each other, if you know what I mean." Nico nodded. "Maybe that's why it was so easy for me to throw him out once I was ready to see what had been right in front of my eyes for all this time."

"So you don't regret it?"

"No, not at all. It's just... I'm not used to being alone, you know. That's why I talked to the fish when it's just the kids and me. Even if Ray didn't listen most of the time, there was still someone there who kept me from realizing how lonely I was in the marriage," she admitted.

"It makes having friends so much more important," Nico knew.

"I think maybe that's also the reason why I chose the profession as a therapist. I could help others fix things, that I couldn't fix, because I wasn't willing to see the problem in the first place." It was the first time she had spoken that thought aloud. "Why did you join the Navy?" she asked then.

"It's pretty simple: My father was in the Navy and so I wanted to join the Navy as well."

"Was he a seal as well?"

"My dad? God no. He wouldn't have survived hell week," Nico replied and flinched slightly at the thought.

"What's hell week?"

"It's a week during the training where they deprive you of sleep and ride you the hardest. Only if you get through it you are allowed to start the Basic Underwater demolition training."

"How man get through hell week?" Dani was truly curious now. She had heard things about the Navy Seals and had a basic idea of what they were doing, but she didn't know much about their training.

"About 80% are gone after hell week. Only a few make it to the end," he informed her.

"So what did your father do in the Navy?" she went back to the original question.

"He was a ship technician and served in Vietnam," Nico said. "He was one of the guys who only joined because of the money and the lack of other options. He wasn't cut out for the Navy or war. He was good at the technical stuff and so they kept him once he got back from Vietnam, but he never went out for combat again. Until this day he changes the channel if he sees a report or news about a war."

"I guess he wasn't too fond of the idea of you serving as well," she guessed.

"No, but I needed to get away from home and he understood that," he said and elaborated when Dani looked questioningly at him questioningly. "I never had the best relationship with my mother. She wasn't a bad mother, just one who only accepted things her way. That was ok until I hit puberty. Once I had my own opinion about things it didn't work anymore. We were fighting about everything and nothing . That never changed , not even when she was already sick."

"She dead?" Dani wanted to know.

"Yeah, for 18 years now. Lung cancer. She was a heavy smoker."

"I'm sorry," Nico said and placed her hand in his on the back of the couch, squeezing his fingers.

"It's alright. As I said, we were never close," he replied and gave her a squeeze back. They were silent for a moment while their fingers remained linked and Dani softly stroked hers over his palm. Then nearly at the exact moment they realized what they were doing and both looked at their joined hands.

"I guess this isn't exactly 'just friends' behavior," Dani sighed and pulled her hand away.

"No," Nico agreed and stared at his now empty hand. He missed her touch already.

"I'm sorry, Nico, I really don't mean to lead you on. It's just... ," she stopped because she really didn't know how to explain it. "I'm sorry," she then said again.

"You don't have to apologize every time you touch me now. You're always talking with your hands and you're always touching people and comforting them. It's part of who you are and I don't want you to change," he told her with a soft look in his eyes. "But you know that the last months weren't easy for me and now that Marshall is dead... I'm a bit on the edge here and for me it's a very fine line between not enough and too much at the moment," he admitted and looked down for a second to hide the emotions in his eyes.

"How about this: the next time I get the urge to touch you or hold you , I will ask you first and you tell me honestly if it's ok or not?" she proposed, knowing that to anyone but them this arrangement would probably be completely ridiculous.

"Sounds like a plan," he nodded. He looked her in the eyes again and saw sympathy for him written all over her face.

"Not tonight, Dani," he shook his head lightly, knowing what she was asking without saying anything.

"You have to let yourself grieve at one point Nico, or it won't get better," she insisted.

"I know, but not tonight. I think I unloaded enough for a day," he replied and realized as he spoke how drained her felt from his declaration in the beginning. The talk about his past afterwards had been ok, because those ghosts didn't haunt him anymore. Telling her about his feelings though had exhausted him.

"We should get some rest, it's late," Dani said, guessing his thoughts.

"You want to go out for breakfast tomorrow morning? There's a small diner down the road. We past it when we got here," Nico offered, got up from the couch and stretched.

"It's probably a good idea for us to get out of this house for a while," she agreed.

"Good. Nine thirty ok?"

"Perfect. Goodnight Nico," she smiled and got up as well. Awkwardly they were standing in front of each other. It would feel weird just going to their rooms. Shaking hands was out of the question either. "Is it ok if I give you a good night kiss on the cheek?" Dani asked, sticking to their agreement.

"Yes," Nico replied and had to chuckle at the absurdity of the situation. He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her cheek as she did the same.

"Sleep well," he wished her and returned the small wave she gave him when she stood in her bedroom door before she closed it. He switched off all the lights in the living room, poured her cold coffee down the drain in the kitchen and then went up to his room to get some sleep. Tomorrow was going to be another exhausting day, because they were far from being done talking.

**TBC**


	10. Out and back

******I seriously cannot believe that it took me this long to update. And I cannot express how sorry I am. At times I thought I would never be able to update again. But here I am. Thanks to all of who reviewed and who kept sending me messages asking me to update.  
**

**And a huge THANK YOU to Amanda for betaing this chapter so you all don't have to read my stupid mistakes anymore.**

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**Chapter 10: Out and back**

When Nico passed Dani's room the next morning, he could hear the blow-dryer running inside and knew that it would still take a while until she was ready. It was just nine o'clock, and they had agreed on nine thirty so she still had half an hour. Slowly, he walked into the kitchen and turned on the coffee maker. Falling asleep had been easy the night before, but in the morning he had woken up with a start. What had simply felt like relief the day before had overnight become embarrassment. Had he really told her that he loved her? He shook his head, remembering the words. He wasn't one to run away, but he had to admit to himself that he had been tempted there for a second. When the coffee maker was ready, he grabbed a cup, placed it in the dock and pressed the go button. Coffee scent filled the air, and he inhaled deeply. How would their breakfast go? Would they be able to talk, or would the tension be too thick for any normal conversation? He sipped his coffee slowly and wandered over to the large window. While he looked outside, he tried to focus only on the scenery and his beverage, but that was hard. Danielle was a fascinating woman and the tension between them and the talk the night before didn't help to get her out of his head.

When Dani stepped out of her room, she found Nico still in front of the window with an empty coffee cup in his hand. She had steeled herself for meeting him before leaving her room with a few deep breaths. She was able to put a smile on her face, even if it was a forced one.

"Hey, you already started breakfast?" she asked him. Nico turned his head before he spoke and she knew that he must have heard her coming.

"Just some coffee," he shrugged. "You're ready to go?"

"Yes. I just need my shoes and my purse and we can leave," she nodded and hurried back to her room to get said items. As always she was a lot taller once she wore her shoes. The drive to the small diner passed in silence because both didn't really know what to say after the revelations of last night. Small talk seemed hollow and they were both still too exhausted to dive into the hot topics again.

"Smells great in here," Dani smiled when they entered the diner and the waitress guided them to a free table.

"Hope breakfast will taste as good as it smells," Nico replied and pulled the chair out for her.

"Thank you," she said, still with the smile firmly in place and sat down.

"Do you already know what you want to drink?" the waitress asked them as she handed them the menus.

"Coffee?" Nico asked in Dani's direction and she nodded. "Then two coffee, please," he ordered.

"Pancakes or Danish?" Dani wondered aloud while she studied the menu. She closed it when she had decided with a satisfied smirk.

"And?" Nico asked when she closed the menu and placed it on the table.

"Both," she grinned. "And you?" she wanted to know.

"Pancakes, scrambled eggs, half bacon, half sausage," he let her know and closed his own menu.

"Your coffee," the waitress said when she came back to their table at that moment and they placed their orders before she left again.

"Did you sleep well?" Nico asked her then when it became clear that she wouldn't end the silence between them.

"Yes, I did. I was exhausted. And you?"

"Yeah, me too," he said leaving out how he woke up.

"Do you have any plans for what we are going to do today?" she asked cautiously.

"No, but judging by the look on your face I'd say you do," Nico knew, and Dani had to laugh. He knew her too well.

"We passed some small shops when we drove here, and I thought we could go shopping," she suggested, trying to make it sound as tempting as possible.

"Shopping?" he asked skeptically, "In these shoes you're wearing?"

"Would you stop complaining about my shoes already?! I'm not saying anything about the black power suit you're wearing again," she told him pointing at him meaningfully. "So what about shopping? You in or you out?" she wanted to know then.

"That's a rhetorical question since I don't have a choice anyway," Nico told her and leaned back in his chair.

"True," she grinned and flipped her hair back without realizing it. Nico noticed it however. "I bet you make a great assistant."

"You mean I will be an excellent pack animal," he nodded knowingly and made her giggle again. It was fun bantering with him, and she was glad that they were still able to.

"That, too. We might find something for you as well."

"What? A Hawaiian shirt?" he asked her wearily and made her laugh out loud that time.

"Don't tempt me. However, you're not the Hawaiian shirt type," Dani replied and leaned back in her chair when the waitress brought their food. For a few minutes, there was silence again while they dug in. This time, it was Dani who started talking again.

"So, uhm, last night you mentioned Gabrielle. How did you two meet?"

"At a party," Nico said. He didn't seem too happy about the topic of her choice, but he knew that she needed him to answer her questions. "A friend at the time who served with Marshall and me celebrated his birthday with a lot of people, and Gabrielle happened to be there."

"Huh," was all Dani said as she tried to picture the scene. She couldn't really imagine Nico chatting up a woman at a party.

"She and Marshall somehow started talking, and I wasn't really paying attention to her. That seemed to get her attention," he hinted but said nothing more.

"So how did she end up with Marshall?" Dani was curious now.

"He really showed his interest in her, and he had more money to impress her with. In the end, that was the bonus. She didn't understand that money alone doesn't make you happy and had to learn the hard way," Nico said and ate some more of his scrambled eggs, using the food as an excuse to pause and collect himself. "And then she got pregnant and married Marshall."

"And made you believe that Juliette was yours."

"She never said it. She just never denied it either. She did whatever she could without directly lying to me," Nico defended her.

"You're sad that she's not yours?"

"For a while I was. However just because she's not mine doesn't mean that I don't care for her," he pointed out.

"You'd be a great dad," she complimented him.

"You'd be surprised," he snorted with not much humor, and Dani got a strange feeling about the whole talk. She had to ask though. "You never wanted kids?"

"What makes you think that I don't have kids?" he asked back seriously, and she nearly choked on her pancake.

"You have kids?" she stuttered wide-eyed.

"A daughter," he nodded while a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.

"You never said anything," Dani accused and lightly slapped his hand.

"You never asked," he shrugged and grinned.

"Tell me about her," Dani requested, curiosity written all over her face. She didn't care that this was none of her business, and obviously Nico didn't seem to mind because otherwise he wouldn't have told her in the first place.

"Her name is Louise. She's 24, and she's a law student," he summed up the basics but Dani's look told him to elaborate. "Her mother and I had a brief affair after I got divorced, and one day she called me and told me that she was pregnant. We didn't want to be together so we never got married. When Louise was two, she got married to her boyfriend and he mainly raised her while I paid child support and saw her sometimes during the holidays. We don't see each other much but we get along well when we do," he explained without emotions. Too little emotions, Dani decided. There was more to that story.

"You never wanted a closer relationship with her?" she asked.

"I did," Nico admitted, "but they moved to San Francisco when she was three and that didn't make it any easier. And she had her new dad," he added and Dani knew then what had happened. Nico had stayed away so his daughter wouldn't have to choose between two fathers.

"That must have been hard."

"It wasn't easy, but we made it through," he shrugged.

"And you got Juliette by then," Dani did the math.

"What are you implying?" he wanted to know.

"That maybe you tried to make up with Juliette what you missed with Louise," Dani told him straight out. Nico remained silent for a while, then nodded.

"Maybe," he agreed.

"So how often do you see her? Louise, I mean."

"About two or three times a year. She did an internship here in New York last year. I saw her almost every day back then," he told her, and the way he said it showed that he had enjoyed that time immensely.

"You have a picture of her?" Dani asked because she didn't want to dig too deep into this. She had hurt him enough last night and didn't want to cause him unnecessary pain.

"No, not here," he shook his head. "I've got some on my ipad. I can show you later," he added with a smile.

"I'd like that," she smiled back, and they didn't shy away when their eyes met this time.

"You ever wanted more kids?" Nico asked then, staying on the kids topic.

"God no!" Dani burst out. "That is why Matt and I broke up in the first place," she told him. "He wanted kids, and I am done with having them. Mine are nearly grown up, and I don't want to start over."

"Understandable," Nico nodded.

"You're planning on fathering another kid sometime in the future?" she asked him.

"Fathering? No," he laughed, "I'm too old for that. In a few years I'd be happy to be grandpa Nico, but I definitely don't want to raise another kid. Juliette is enough trouble, even if she isn't mine," he explained and for some reason Dani felt relieved all of a sudden. She didn't want to analyze why though so she decided to change the topic to something lighter again.

"So, Nico, are you ready to go shopping?" she asked him with a smile.

"I think I'll need another coffee first," he sighed, but couldn't hide the small smile on his face.

* * *

They spent the next two hours browsing through the several shops while occasionally Dani tried something on and even bought small souvenirs for her kids. Nico obediently followed her through the shopsand frequently indulged in nagging and complaining, but always made sure she kept going when she offered to just return to their apartment. It was a nice change for him to just worry about shopping bags for once and he didn't want to go back to the place where he had bared his soul the night before. He still felt embarrassed and uncomfortable about it, though knew that he couldn't avoid it forever.

"I'm hungry again," Dani interrupted his thoughts when she stepped out of another shop.

"There's a coffee store over there. Muffin?" Nico asked and tried not to smile back too brightly when she gave him a smile as an answer to his suggestion.

"All we seem to do is drink coffee, eat and talk," Dani sighed when they sat down with their beverages.

"We wanted to relax, remember?" he reminded her, but knew that she was right.

"Mmmh, but we could do something else," she said, broke a piece of her muffin off and stuck it in her mouth. Nico's eyes instantly found the few crumbs that stuck to her lips and he wished he could just lean over and slowly kiss them away while his fingers would tangle in her hair.

He snapped out of his fantasy when Dani gave him a funny look and had to clear his voice before he was able to speak "You have something on your lip," he told her.

"Oh." Dani wiped the crumbs away. "Better?" she asked then.

"Yes," he nodded even though better wasn't the word he would have used, at least not when he hadn't kissed them away.

"So, how about those plans? You have any idea what else we could do?" she asked him again. Oh, he had ideas, but they surely weren't the ideas she was talking about.

"We could check online once we get back to the house. Maybe there's something to see or do around here," he shrugged.

"I kind of figured you've been here before," Dani wondered.

"I have, but I never made it farther than jogging down the beach or going grocery shopping," he admitted.

"So what do you usually do when you're here?"

"I read, sleep, maybe watch some TV," he trailed off, because that was basically it.

"Bo-ring," Dani teased him with a smile and he wanted to reply but just then her cell phone went off. She checked the caller ID, and her eyebrows knit together. "It's Ray Jay, I have to take this," she apologized before answering. Nico watched her while she talked to her son, and it became apparent after just a few seconds that something was seriously wrong. The longer she talked on the phone the more freaked out she looked. He tried to make sense of what he heard, but all he got was something about prison and lawyers. It didn't make any sense to him.

"What's wrong?" he asked as soon as she hung up.

"Ray Jay has been arrested and needs a decent lawyer that Ray is refusing to pay for. We need to go back," Dani said in a hurry, got up and simply walked out of the coffee shop. Nico quickly paid and then followed her. She was already pacing in front of the car. Nico went to her and stopped her by gently taking her by her shoulders.

"Dani, what has he been arrested for?" he asked, already formulating plan how to get him out of it.

"Possession of Marijuana," she told him and looked him in the eyes.

"Does he smoke pot?" he asked.

"I don't know, Nico. God, I don't…he said something about trying to get rid of the plant when he was caught by the police because of a broken tail light. I don't know," she replied helplessly.

"Don't worry; we'll get him out of it. I'll take care of the lawyer," Nico assured her and the look in his eyes kept her from protesting against it.

"I just wanted a break… just for a short while," she sighed and rested her forehead against his chest. Gently he stroked her hair back over her shoulders before he enveloped her in a hug. She wrapped her arms around his middle and held onto him. When she felt him placing a soft kiss against her hair she squared her shoulders and stepped back. She shouldn't drag him into her mess again as long as she couldn't promise him anything.

"Will you please drive me home?" she asked him and looked him pleadingly in the eyes.

"Of course," he nodded and unlocked the car.

* * *

The drive had passed mostly in silence, except for when Dani had called her ex-husband and then needed to vent afterwards. Nico didn't say much but listened to her. It wasn't that he didn't have an opinion about her ex-husband, but he needed all the facts first before he could say anything that would really help her. When they reached her house Dani got out of the car and unlocked the front door while he got her bag out of the trunk. He followed her to the door where she was waiting for him.

"I'm really sorry I ruined your vacation," she apologized when he handed her the bag.

"You didn't ruin anything," he disagreed.

"Maybe you can just drive back? You booked the house for a while longer, after all," she went on and he knew she hadn't really listened to what he had said. Or she didn't believe him.

"It's fine. Don't worry about it. Just call me when you know what exactly is going on so I can take care of the lawyer," he reminded her of his offer.

"Thank you, Nico," Dani replied quietly, placed her bag on the floor, wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. "Thank you," she repeated and felt him hugging her back. They stayed in the embrace for some moments before she slowly pulled back. Dani hesitated when she was about to remove her arms from around his neck. She missed his warmth already and hadn't even fully pulled back yet. Nico looked down at her, and she saw how much he cared for her when her eyes met his. He found the same feeling mirrored in her eyes and it was like somebody had flicked a switch. One second they were hugging, and the next her lips were on his like she could drink in the warmth of his support and keep it with her always. It wasn't hesitating like the first kiss. It was passionate and heated. Dani pulled him fully inside and they both barely realized when the door slammed shut behind them. They stood in her hallway and made out like teenagers. Nico had already unbuttoned her blouse and his hands were massaging her breasts while she had ripped his shirt out of his trousers and was opening it as fast as she could. She didn't care that he still wore his coat or that this would complicate their whole relationship even more. She didn't have more answers for him than when they had talked only yesterday. But she couldn't think and she didn't want to stop. All she wanted to do was feel him, and he didn't object. They moved towards the stairs but stumbled slightly when Dani tried walking up them backwards in her heels while she refused to stop kissing him. In the end, she kicked her shoes off, and Nico solved the height difference by hoisting her up. She drew him even closer by wrapping her legs around his waist so he could carry her upstairs. She sucked on his neck, and her bra went flying when they were halfway up. She moaned when he touched her breasts again and he groaned when she rubbed up against him, stimulating them both. The frenzy came to a screeching halt when his cell phone rang and burst their bubble just when they had reached her bedroom door. He all but dropped her before he answered his phone without checking the caller ID. Suddenly feeling embarrassed, Dani hastily closed her blouse and wrapped her arms around herself as she listened to him talking on the phone and saw that he was getting dressed as well.

"That was Juliette. She wants to see me. I have to go," he said and wasn't sure what to do when he saw Dani's posture. He wanted to kiss her goodnight and show her that he didn't regret this, even though it went against everything they had talked about, but she looked like a deer in headlights and so he decided against it. "Goodnight Doctor," he said instead. "Call me if you need me."

"Good night Nico," she replied quietly and sunk down against her bedroom door when she heard the front door click shut.

**Tbc.. hopefully it won't take me another five months to update**


End file.
